investibation

/in ves ti ba' shun/ n. (Portmanteau of "investigation" and "masturbation") An investigation with no hope of actually providing any answers, often to a question or case where the answer is already known, but not provable.

O.J. Simpson did not so much conduct an actual search for the "real killers" of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman as he did an <i>investibation</i>.

President George W. Bush ordered an immediate <i>investibation</i> into the Valerie Plame leak, mainly to shut the public up.

investibation by Mike Boomshadow August 23, 2007

investibation

Investibation is when you put alot of time and effort into masturbating.

I had a lot of time on my hands yesterday, so I began an investibation.

investibation by sullenfrag February 27, 2013

special investigation branch 

The undercover investigative element of the British Royal Military Police. An organisation that is supposed to blend into the wider military community to mirror the effect that CID provide to civil police. In reality it is populated by a bunch of barely literate mouth breathers who spend all day taking screenshots of Facebook and being outsmarted by even the slowest witted squaddie. Most likely military group to be Swingers.

In Special Investigation Branch office:
SIB: "Look sunshine, we know you did it, confess or else"
Perp: "I didn't do it"
SIB: "Oh, you sure? Well, you'd better get out of here, we'll be watching you"
Perp: "L8rs"

special investigation branch by Bumsnorkler March 15, 2019

Investigationgate

A disinformation tactic where political party A abuses of their newfound power to publicly accuse and investigate opposition party B for the crimes committed by political party A that subsequently got political party A into power in the first place.

Following their questionable 2022 midterm election victory, the GOP-controlled House commenced investigationgate against Democrats for accusations of election fraud, Hunter Biden’s Laptop, the war in Ukraine among a plethora of other previously planted mass-media conspiracies.

Investigationgate by Bobtom March 28, 2023

investigaytion

The process of trying to figure out if one of your peers is gay.

Amy: I think Bob is gay.
Joe: Maybe, lets conduct an investigaytion just to be sure.

investigaytion by alrightstill February 16, 2009

myspace investigation 

To find out details about somebody's life by looking at their myspace.

"I was wondering if Joe was still dating Jane, so I did some myspace investigation and found out they broke up."

myspace investigation by lc30890 October 13, 2008

Historical Investigation 

The worse possible project an IB student can be assigned. This enormously long and difficult project must be completed as part of the IB Topics of the 20th Century history course, or else you fail. It involves answering a specific research question of interest (well, really, who gives a fuck?) and poring through books and journal articles on the subject, therefore wasting an enormous part of the time you DON'T have as an IB student.

I hate the historical investigation. It shouldn't have the FIVE parts it contains, but rather be a single paper in which we are allowed to write more than 2000 words--if we need to

Historical Investigation by fuckmylife22003 January 4, 2010