the strange equilibrium in which you are equally happy and sad. this state is usually felt intensely and tends to slow down your drive not knowing what to do, where to go, how to achieve goals
"i feel so happily immobile, so ecstatically static, so lifenly deathy, why must i go through this. I'm trying so damn hard to fight it, i tried chemicals, sports, socializing, but im stuck in limbo."
Boys who enjoy yaoi (a genre in Japan that contains sexual and/or romantic relations between two men); literally translates to "rotten boy"; corresponding female : fujoshi