A horoscope so bad that it strikes fear into the heart of the reader, rendering them unable take action or make a decision on anything or to even leave the house. This is caused by a paralyzing fear that those actions or decisions may cause the predictions to come true.
After reading "There is a lot of uncertainty around financial transactions and investments right now, and the wrong decision could result in dire consequences" in his daily Horrorscope, Edward climbed back into bed, pulled the sheets over his head and remained there for the rest of the day.
Edward only had enough gas in his car to get to the gas station but was not sure if he had enough money in his account to pay for gas. His cell phone service had been cut off because his payments were in arrears, and since the only way he could be sure he had enough money (to pay for gas) would be to call the bank, he felt it best to hide in bed and hope his horoscope for tomorrow was more positive.
Edward only had enough gas in his car to get to the gas station but was not sure if he had enough money in his account to pay for gas. His cell phone service had been cut off because his payments were in arrears, and since the only way he could be sure he had enough money (to pay for gas) would be to call the bank, he felt it best to hide in bed and hope his horoscope for tomorrow was more positive.
by Edward Albee Deavers May 20, 2011
Get the Horrorscope mug.An 'out of the box' description of the future of a person/situation, (generally bad) based on the obvious that isn't being seen from 'within the box'.
I didn't need to be Mystic Meg to tell you the fate that would befall Johnny when he married Jo..... it was written in his horrorscope.
by MissCC October 15, 2008
Get the Horrorscope mug.Related Words
horrorscope
• Horrorscope 2018
• Corona Horrorscope
• horoscope
• horrorcore
• horoscope delight
• Horoscope Mobile App
• Horoscopes Are For People Who Has A Cystic Lesion On The Right Side Of A Face
• Horoscopes Are For Playing Cards On Avoiding Cystic Lesions And Facial Reconstruction Surgery
• horrorslop
An adjective applied to a project where there are so many unknowns that you may as well consult the stars for an estimate or timeline
We don't know anything about this work; the requirements are really unclear but the project seems huge. It's a horrorscope project
by hicksandhudson September 21, 2009
Get the Horrorscope mug.The name you call the min-cam they shove up your rectum to look for polyps if they forget to render you unconcious first. Also known as a keister-kam or the Silver Stallion.
by Harry Flashman June 27, 2003
Get the horrorscope mug."im sooooo frikin uninspired"
"check out your horrorscope and see whats gonna happen" "maybe youll meet your soul mate soon"
*checks hororscope*
"im gonna meet the love of my life in 3 days!!!! AND win the lottery!!!!!"
*4 days later*
"breaks up with bf and gets in car accident."
"check out your horrorscope and see whats gonna happen" "maybe youll meet your soul mate soon"
*checks hororscope*
"im gonna meet the love of my life in 3 days!!!! AND win the lottery!!!!!"
*4 days later*
"breaks up with bf and gets in car accident."
by NiiceGuy October 18, 2008
Get the horrorscope mug.Today a friend will call to tea
I can't quite see his face
And you may think of going abroad
Or counting calories
Tell the truth, John
When you're all alone
Don't you ever cry?
Don't you wonder why?
Tell the truth, John
When you're all alone
Don't you know it's true
In your heart of stone?
Tell the truth, John
When you're all alone
Don't you ever cry?
Don't you wonder why?
Tell the truth, John
Is someone causing problems at work?
Is money rather scarce?
A conflict could erupt at home
If you defy the stars
In the Jag, John
Balaclava on
No good looking back
Meet you round the knack
In the Jag, John
Balaclava on
Don't you know it's true
In your horrorscope?
In the Jag, John
Balaclava on
No good looking back
Meet you round the knack
In the Jag, John
Better run, John
Get the motor on
No good looking back
Meet you round the knack
Better run, John
Today romance is in the air
Except for Scorpios
July's ideal for planning a crime
If you live through June
Better run, John
Get the motor on
No good looking back
Meet you round the knack
Better run, John
Get the motor on
I can't quite see his face
And you may think of going abroad
Or counting calories
Tell the truth, John
When you're all alone
Don't you ever cry?
Don't you wonder why?
Tell the truth, John
When you're all alone
Don't you know it's true
In your heart of stone?
Tell the truth, John
When you're all alone
Don't you ever cry?
Don't you wonder why?
Tell the truth, John
Is someone causing problems at work?
Is money rather scarce?
A conflict could erupt at home
If you defy the stars
In the Jag, John
Balaclava on
No good looking back
Meet you round the knack
In the Jag, John
Balaclava on
Don't you know it's true
In your horrorscope?
In the Jag, John
Balaclava on
No good looking back
Meet you round the knack
In the Jag, John
Better run, John
Get the motor on
No good looking back
Meet you round the knack
Better run, John
Today romance is in the air
Except for Scorpios
July's ideal for planning a crime
If you live through June
Better run, John
Get the motor on
No good looking back
Meet you round the knack
Better run, John
Get the motor on
Don't you know it's true
In your horroscope?
You know there's nothing you can't do
It's in your horrorscope
Better run, John
Get the motor on
No good looking back
Meet you round the knack
Better run, John
Today
Today
Your new life starts
Today
Your new life starts
Today
Your new life starts
Today
Your new life starts
In your horroscope?
You know there's nothing you can't do
It's in your horrorscope
Better run, John
Get the motor on
No good looking back
Meet you round the knack
Better run, John
Today
Today
Your new life starts
Today
Your new life starts
Today
Your new life starts
Today
Your new life starts
by Gothic Miscreant October 13, 2023
Get the Horrorscope mug.1. Dictator Kim of North Korea will join his father and grandfather in hell.
2. President Trump won't get his Dread Wall of Mexico built.
3. President Putin will leave office rejected, ejected, and dejected.
2. President Trump won't get his Dread Wall of Mexico built.
3. President Putin will leave office rejected, ejected, and dejected.
Horrorscope 2018 for both dictators and murderers sounds good news for the world, with the defeat of ISIS and the death of some African dictators.
by MathPlus September 4, 2017
Get the Horrorscope 2018 mug.