Help me to help you 

A totally threadbare request/remonstration designed to merely extort excessive/unwarranted effort/labor from someone, but without said outlay's truly creating any significant improvement in the person's life or in his overall physical/mental/emotional/legal/financial/social status.

Probation officer: Now, Son, you know how much I care about you, and I have your best interests at heart. I need for you to prove to me and my supervisors that you are indeed a responsible-minded young man, though, so I want you to volunteer to work 20 hours a week at the local cattle-farm... it'll allow me to better convince the authorities to "wipe the slate clean" and restore your driving privileges.
Teenager, scowling disgustedly: Yeah, right --- you actually expect me to go and bust my ass in the hot sun shovellin' manure and diggin' fence-post holes for four hours a day, and not get a DIME for my efforts?!??? Sound to me like a classic "help me to help you" stunt just to get some free labor out of me --- no THANKS!

Help me to help you by QuacksO February 10, 2017

Are you trying to help me grow a beard 

This is a process we’re you let a boy eat your coochie

Are you trying to help me grow a beard

Are you trying to help me grow a beard by anonymous September 12, 2021

Paying the people around me with money you made from my enslavement to help you keep me enslaved 

And I still don't give a single absolute fuck about historical slavery or child murder.

Hym "Paying the people around me with money you made from my enslavement to help you keep me enslaved now going to be the impetus for child murder. They should have told you to go fuck yourself so I'm going to go ahead and do it for them. Go fuck yourself!"

Paying the people around me with money you made from my enslavement to help you keep me enslaved by Hym Iam July 5, 2025