Failasturbate

The act of poor masturbation which results in a failure or inability to complete the act to obtain an orgasm.

I already masturbated five times to the Golden Girls season three DVD and on my sixth time I failasturbated so I called it a night.

by Lawofdiminishingmasturbation March 17, 2009

fantasturbate

when one masturbates so impeccably well that he has a fantastic and accomplished feeling afterwards; when he can look back on that day as a day that was worth living. If one has these feelings, he deserves an award, for he has just fantasturbated.

After a long and depressing day at work, the man came home and felt the need to fantasturbate. After he did, he went to sleep quite satisfied.

by mrgatorademan April 18, 2010

Flasturbate

To masturbate while having a flaccid penis.

Devon: That was a great flasturbation session.
Gary: How do you even manage to flasturbate?

by Flasty December 22, 2014

Flasturbate

A verb, meaning to masturbate at speeds exceeding 55 mph. If you ever masturbated in a moving car or on an airplane that was not Flasturbating. It was masturbating in a car or an airplane. Flasturbation has to do with the speed of you hand.

The flash doesn't masturbate, he flasturbates.

by Seuse November 29, 2003

Failsturbation

The act of falling asleep or passing out while masturbating.

George is the king of failsturbation...he is always passing out jerking his dong.

by kel80mak September 30, 2011

Failsturbation

The act of flogging one's penis in an ineffectual attempt to achieve arousal and/or climax. Typical attempts last 2-3 hours. Epic attempts can last several days.

Rich failsturbated so hard he irreparably damaged his dojj. What a failsturbation!?!?!

by TrickyTraegs May 14, 2011