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wood on wood 

When you are lonely, and cannot find a lover to caress your heavy package, you will find yourself laying your sack of gold, on the corner of a desk, or wooden surface.
As Jerry realized he would never find a lover, he did some good old fashioned wood on wood.

early bird gets the wood on 

(Mainly used in the gay community) When a man wakes up before the other man, he will wake him him up by giving him a blow job.
Boy: Hey, early bird gets the wood on.
Boy: Haha. Just you wait

knock on wood 

this expression is a superstition that is used in the hope that a good thing will continue to occur even after its mentioned.
For Example : "My throat is finally feeling better, knock on wood!"

or

"I'm so happy it hasn't rained yet, knock on wood"
knock on wood by [DEE]best! December 27, 2009

dump on wood 

The act of defecating on a tree or similar piece of wood. Used as an insult.
Alex can go dump on wood if he thinks I'm gonna pay him back for that hooker he bought me.
dump on wood by Alex Dumpance January 28, 2009

Dancing on Wood

Another word for grinding ; meaning when a girl dirty dances on a guy making him hard as wood
Woman 1: How was the club last night?

Woman 2: Great I was dancing on wood all night!

knock on wood 

1. A phrase used to express that something will or will not happen. This expression alludes to the ages-old superstition that literally knocking on wood would ward off evil spirits.
2. To masturbate, said of males.
(made-up scene from GTA San Andreas)

(at the beach)

Kent Paul: (ogling a hot girl come out of the water) Oi Maccer, just take a look at what just breezed out of the blue. That height, that arse, those jugs, those curves! Blimey if I'd be given the chance now I'd get to chuck my junk in that, knock on wood!
Maccer: Indeed man! Knock on wood, eh. Well alright then! *starts masturbating*
Kent Paul: No, jack-off Jimmy, not... ohh, *mumbles* fucking Northeners!

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Mark H. Proud Urban Dictionary slang author since February 2004.
knock on wood by Mark H October 10, 2005
More from Urban Dictionary

briefcake 

"Did you check out the briefcake in courtroom C?"
briefcake by Ben Frey April 6, 2006
Word of the Day on November 3, 2026
Brought to public attention by Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein in the book on the fall of Richard Nixon, All The President’s Men, ratfucker was Nixon’s term for a political operative who sows chaos among opponents; an agent provocateur. It is thought to have originated among campus political rivalries at USC, and seems to have some usage in the US military.
Along with Nixon’s other ratfuckers, Roger Stone caused fights at otherwise peaceful Democratic Party protests to generate a false narrative that the Democrats were violent and dangerous.
Ratfucker by Ricky Ramjet November 2, 2017
Word of the Day on November 2, 2026

countrypolitan 

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
Word of the Day on November 1, 2026

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026
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