The Almighty 

Redundant. Obviously should be shortened to simply THE. THE is awesome and has the best stories. THE is everything every man ever dreamed of being. THE always stops his motorcycle with an Endo! THE loves Tabasco but hates hot stuff. Every chick in the universe loves THE. If you've gone fast, THE has gone faster; with a hot chick. If you've jumped high, THE has jumped higher; while banging some chick in the ass. If you both got 6 packs, THE drank 8; he got 2 more from the chick at the desk, then she blew him. THE should have been in the NFL, but chose a shitty, menial, average-paying service job instead.

Dude1: I saw the hottest chick at the bar.
THE Almighty: I saw her first. I said, "Hey, How you doin'?" And then we had sex.
Dude1: Bullshit. Shop being THE.

THE Almighty: Hey, How you doin'?
Random chick that has no interest in him: ....

The Almighty by The A Fox July 31, 2012

The Almighty Loaf

Our holy lord and saviour, the almighty loaf has descended from the giant bakery above to make us repent our sins, crusty on the outside but light and fluffy on the inside, he is the ultimate in wheat based food deities.

All hail the Almighty Loaf, for I have sinned and it is only he who may forgive my wrongdoings

The Almighty Loaf by TheLoafBloke March 28, 2017

The almighty three shoe beating 

When you piss off a Norwegian kid so much he has to take off his shoes and one of yours, afterwards he pushes you to the ground and proceeds to beat you with all three shoes.

"Have you ever experienced The almighty three shoe beating!?"

The almighty three shoe beating by Mr.$wag February 25, 2017

The Almighty Mexican Patty Slap 

The most powerful attack that can be dished out on a human. This is done by getting one boca burger patty, slathering it in honey mustard, and smacking some one with it across the face. this does considerable damage to the mental state of the person being slapped

Guy 1:"did you hear about fred? he got the almighty mexican patty slap!"
Guy 2"Oh snap are you serious? is he still breathing on his own?"

The Almighty Mexican Patty Slap by Josh Pimpington December 15, 2007

the almighty Toad 

The almighty toad. Beautiful. Handsome. Majestic. He is everything you wish you were. Favorite food: bagel. Intelligence: 4 iq. Favorite activity: bashing his head on a rock. Creator REEzardRamen

“I would nuke the country of turkey if the almighty Toad asked me to” (me)

the almighty Toad by REEzardRamen July 5, 2022

the almighty oof oak 

*R/IDEEP IN THE GOBLIN CITY WERE 2 VEGGIES, MARII AND EMMA. THEY PRAYED TO BRISUS AND THE MAJESTIC OOF OAK TREE. THEIR PRAYERS WERE ANSWERED BY BRISUS AND LEGEND HAS IT THE OOF OAK IS STILL THERE.

broski- T-THATS THE ALMIGHTY OOF OAK-

the almighty oof oak by Deakythediscobean November 9, 2019

The Almighty Couch 

Someone or a group of people who have little to no understanding of the concepts behind the functionality of Crossfit and thus feels the need to bash it due to ignorance.

Guy 1: Wow crossfit sucks, I don't see how you can call it a workout without spending hours on end at a gym (globo gym).

Guy 2: Dude, you're being acting like "The Almighty Couch". Do your research and check it out for yourself.

The Almighty Couch by VE007 February 6, 2010