Stockings are hung on the chimney,
And the presents are under the tree,
And mama'
s in the kitchen
Making some herbal
tea.
Windows are covered with frost
And the candles are all alight,
But as I wander through this quiet
house,
Something just doesn't seem right.
You see, every year, the neighbors bring us
A Swiss Colony Beef Log.
But the neighbors aren't around (around, around)
There's no Beef Log to be found this year.
(No Beef Log)
Christmas isn't
Christmas
Without a Swiss Colony Beef Log.
Without those cheeses and meats
I don't think I can get along.
Mother tries to comfort me;
She says "Here, Son, have some eggnog."
I fucking
hate eggnog, seriously.
But what do I see
Underneath the tree?
Grandma got a Swiss Colony Beef Log just for me!
Ah, ah, ah, Baby!!
Swiss Colony Beef Log, baby!
That's what Christmas is all about!
My prayer has finally come in a Beef Log baby!
Makes a little boy scream and shout!
Deck the halls with boughs of Swiss Colony!
Fa-la-la-la-la La-la-la-la!
Sweet!