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Haribo Sugarfree Gummy Bears 

The best-tasting super-laxative on the fucking planet. Will efficiently evacuate any fecal matter you have had in your bowels for the past five years. WARNING: MUST BE TAKEN IN SMALL DOSES. An overdose has been known to leave a 250-pound manly-man crying on the bathroom floor. Be careful.
Constipated Man: Hey, I'm plugged up. Can I get some Haribo Sugarfree Gummy Bears?

His Buddy: Yeah, here's a bag. Don't forget to only have a few.

Constipated Man: (Proceeds to eat entire 8-ounce bag)

TWO HOURS LATER

Constipated Man: (Laying on the floor crying) OMFG SATAN OPENED A PORTAL TO HELL IN MY ASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SugarCheese 

Cheese made from cows that are feed only sugarcane from birth. The result is an amazingly sweet cheese. Fed to small children in third world countries as a substitute for candy.

Sugarcheese is a very rare commodity due to the short lifespan of bovine fed only sugarcane. It is also extremelly dangerous to harvest due to the violent behavior induced in the cows by their high sugar levels.
"My grandfather was killed while harvesting Sugarcheese."
SugarCheese by Clawshrimp June 18, 2009

Sugarsweetnite 

A cosplayer primarily known for her cosplays on tik tok and Instagram
Did you see sugarsweetnite’s new post?
A sugarknot is when you are eating your girlfriends pussy and crave sugar, so you grab sugar and rub it all on her clitoris, normally bruising it.
Leli: Ouch, Kyle! This really hurts!
Kyle: Yup, I just made a SugarKnot.
SugarKnot by Dr. Felacio. August 10, 2022

Sugarfree Red Bull 

1. 100 calories less than the regular stuff
2. Gets you way more wired
3. Sex in a can
Like, I was so totally wired from drinking some Sugarfree Red Bull, I stayed up all night and destroyed my jeans. Like chyeah, that stuff is sex, so totally orgasmic.
The hottest girl you will ever know. She’s an incredible dancer. You’ll wanna take her home but not to your parents house. She might steal your face.
Sugaree can really shake it!
sugaree by Crazy_cheese November 23, 2021