Son's Day

The Friday before Mother's Day, when all the son's realize they forgot to get their Mom a gift, and they only have 48 hours in which to do so. So they take the day off work Friday hoping to find some time to get a gift, but they wake up late and get drunk instead (in honor of Son's Day), and end up with no money and no Mother's Day gift.

Son's Day was great this year, I woke up at noon, drank a case of beer and grilled out all day. I hope I have enough money to get Mom a gift for Mother's Day on Sunday.

Son's Day by valleymd May 7, 2010

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National Kick Your 20-Something-Son's A** day

Following the atrocities inflicted on the living legend Mike Tyson during the fight with Jake Paul. It has set such a bad precedent. 50-something-year-old fathers, Black, White, Latinos, Asian, Citizens, and Non-Citizens of our great nation stand united.
United to thwart the notion that this is possible in my house. These 20-something sons are living rent-free.

Today, we declare National Put Your 20-Something-Son in the Box Day. Or National Put Your 20-Something-Son in a Headlock Day. Our national committees have rejected National Kick Your 20-Something-Son A** day.

Dad: What?

Son: I said I can kick you a**.

Dad: (after a minor scuffle and years of near CPS calls and a stong mental game defeats the young buck and siads) I declare today the day third Saturday of November "National Kick Your 20-Something-Son's A** day"

National Kick Your 20-Something-Son's A** day by Sixcircles November 16, 2024

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National Teach your sons day

National reach your sons day is celebrated on April 24th, instead of national rape day, it’s national teach your sons day

Hey it’s national teach your sons day! Time to remind my son how to respect women

National Teach your sons day by THaNoS jeevanos April 19, 2021

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HJ's on Holy Days

When your faith is so devoted to God, that you fear the act of sex. Therefore, only the act of hand job is performed strictly on religious holidays.

Example 1 Margaret is a wicked slut most of the year, but since she's Catholic she'll only give HJ's on Holy Days.

Example 2 Guy - Why don't we go back to my place and I'll take you to pound town…

Girl - Sorry hon, today is Assumption and I only give HJ's on Holy Days

HJ's on Holy Days by deucebiggss February 27, 2014

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Skeef

To take something small, that doesn't quite qualify as a theft. Probably from the Danish "skæv" or the Dutch "scheef", both of which are pronounced similarly, meaning "askew, or not quite right'. To change an item's ownership without permission, but only something small and of little worth.

"I skeefed an apple off the neighbor's tree." "I skeefed some chips outta your bag when you looked away." "Don't skeef my chair when I go to the bathroom."

Skeef by kachinaflonk July 16, 2026

Word of the Day on July 17, 2026

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Hair spider

A tight, tangled knot of loose hair and lint that forms inside clothing during the clothes dryer cycle. It typically hides inside garments, causing an annoying lump or a phantom tickling sensation against the skin until it is found or falls out onto the floor during folding.

I was folding my clothes and a huge hair spider fell out onto my hand

Hair spider by Kmorsels July 15, 2026

Word of the Day on July 16, 2026

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bullshot

n. A screenshot fabricated by a company to misrepresent the graphics of a game; a combination of the words bullshit and screenshot.

Originated from Penny Arcade, a popular gaming webcomic.

-Have you seen Madden 2006 for the Xbox 360? The graphics are gonna be awesome!
-Dude, the Madden 2006 images they showed at E3 were bullshots. It doesn't look nearly as good as they said.

bullshot by Worker Unit #503,298,545 September 26, 2005

Word of the Day on July 15, 2026

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