Son's Day 

The Friday before Mother's Day, when all the son's realize they forgot to get their Mom a gift, and they only have 48 hours in which to do so. So they take the day off work Friday hoping to find some time to get a gift, but they wake up late and get drunk instead (in honor of Son's Day), and end up with no money and no Mother's Day gift.

Son's Day was great this year, I woke up at noon, drank a case of beer and grilled out all day. I hope I have enough money to get Mom a gift for Mother's Day on Sunday.

Son's Day by valleymd May 7, 2010

National Kick Your 20-Something-Son's A** day

Following the atrocities inflicted on the living legend Mike Tyson during the fight with Jake Paul. It has set such a bad precedent. 50-something-year-old fathers, Black, White, Latinos, Asian, Citizens, and Non-Citizens of our great nation stand united.
United to thwart the notion that this is possible in my house. These 20-something sons are living rent-free.

Today, we declare National Put Your 20-Something-Son in the Box Day. Or National Put Your 20-Something-Son in a Headlock Day. Our national committees have rejected National Kick Your 20-Something-Son A** day.

Dad: What?

Son: I said I can kick you a**.

Dad: (after a minor scuffle and years of near CPS calls and a stong mental game defeats the young buck and siads) I declare today the day third Saturday of November "National Kick Your 20-Something-Son's A** day"

National Kick Your 20-Something-Son's A** day by Sixcircles November 16, 2024

National Teach your sons day 

National reach your sons day is celebrated on April 24th, instead of national rape day, it’s national teach your sons day

Hey it’s national teach your sons day! Time to remind my son how to respect women

National Teach your sons day by THaNoS jeevanos April 19, 2021

HJ's on Holy Days 

When your faith is so devoted to God, that you fear the act of sex. Therefore, only the act of hand job is performed strictly on religious holidays.

Example 1 Margaret is a wicked slut most of the year, but since she's Catholic she'll only give HJ's on Holy Days.

Example 2 Guy - Why don't we go back to my place and I'll take you to pound town…

Girl - Sorry hon, today is Assumption and I only give HJ's on Holy Days

HJ's on Holy Days by deucebiggss February 27, 2014