Shit Blanket 

Much like the blankets held out by firemen to catch people jumping out of buildings on fire, a shit blanket is there to help catch the shit falling out of your ring of fire (butt hole), and reduce the effect of splashback.

This is done by throwing a few sheets of paper down to lay on the surface of the water. Some people like to take this too far, and instead put half the roll of paper down the toilet turning the shit blanket into more of a shit cushion.

Leroy: "Hey Bob, I've taught myself to shit before I piss so the splashback isn't so bad."

Bob: "Well gee Leroy, you could have just put down a shit blanket first."

Leroy: "I'm saving tree's yo."

Shit Blanket by panda4king January 2, 2011

Shit in a blanket 

When you lay toilet paper down in a public toilet so when you shit you don't have dirty water splash on your balls.

Friend 1" OHH man I cant believe you took a dump in that dirty bathroom!"
Friend 2" It's ok, I took a Shit in a blanket"

Shit in a blanket by Thugnificentsupercock November 18, 2009

SHIT TO A BLANKET 

To adhere strongly to, to follow closely. Also used to describe the presence of an unwanted person who will not take a hint.

1) That adhesive is brilliant. It sticks like shit to a blanket!
2) I knew they were following me, but I couldn't shake them off. They stuck to me like shit to a blanket.
3) She latched on to me in the bar and I couldn't get rid of her. She stuck like shit to a blanket.

SHIT TO A BLANKET by Finbarthebad October 3, 2007

Like shit to a blanket 

To be stuck to someone or something like shit to a blanket means that you are very attached to a person or thing and spend alot of time with them or it

Ryan: Kellie won't leave me alone !
Lauren: she is stuck to you like shit to a blanket !

Like shit to a blanket by Shocker Los April 22, 2017

Like shit to an Army blanket 

An old expression dating back at least to British National Service (1950's) and probably a lot earlier. Possibly for as long as there have been British Armies that supplied blankets.

Was also commonly used in former British Territories and Dominions (Australia etc.) which now form the Commonwealth.

To attach to something very securely.

Also to hang around something or someone very persistently.

"This glue will stick that on the wall like shit to an Army blanket."

"He's stuck to his boss like shit to an Army blanket."

Like shit to an Army blanket by OldSchoolUK May 18, 2009