Retired surfie

A person who looks like a past or veteran surfer but in actuality doesn’t even go to the beach but just has the typical appearances of such a person (e.g., aged, blond hair streaks, tanned, possibly a mullet, unkempt curly blond hair, surfy sunnies like oaklies; wears boardies, t shirt and thongs).

Aussie friend gets a blond hair make over.
Me: Mate, you look like a bogan or a retired surfie, can’t tell which one’s worse! You don’t even know how to swim!