Ocean Hippy

Ocean Hippies are "Surfer Hipsters" that have been adopted into regular society by means of genetic dilution, natural selection, changes in popular culture, and migration from coastal regions. Typically caucasian male between the ages of 12-30. It is neither surfer or hippy, as it does not need to be vegetarian or require a constant supply of narcotics to sustain life. Ocean hippies typically do not realize the absence of the ocean until late into their maturity, but by then the genes have stabilized. Generally imaginitive creatures. Studies have shown constant smiling to be a common trait. Capable of reciting some information and responding to conversation. This is not to be confused with actual intelligence as the O.H. does not know what it is saying and will have no recollection of the event. Usually seen walking around alone, almost in a daze, attempting to find something to keep its attention active. To the untrained eye some would think it to be independant and have individualist tendancies, but infact the specimen is unaware of its surroundings. It may also believe itself to be contributing to society, when in reality, it is a danger to itself and to the people around it, both physically and influentially. Having this personality become a fad among North American popular culture would have devastating effects on the economy.

That’s my very distant cousin Cody, he’s such an ocean hippy.

Ocean Hippy by TheBigZamboni June 16, 2018