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married sex 

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The redundant sex that results after several years of marriage. It is not necessarily bad, just boring. You know she likes "this" and she knows you like "that" so all you do is "this and that". There tends to be no deviation from the set pattern after several years and all foreplay disappears. Undress, lie down, hump (only 1-2 positions allowable), and done.
Me: "I wanted to 69 with the wife last night and get out the ropes but all I got was married sex."

Friend: "Bummer, man. That must have been boring!"
married sex by married man May 11, 2009
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married sex 

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generally performed first thing in the morning before work starts and anyone is awake. sneak out to kitchen, turn lights on, start kettle boiling so as to make noise to act as the alibi proving you are in the kitchen, sneak very softly to the toilet an crank the shit outta yourself, sneak back out to kitchen then walk loudly back to toilet and piss loudly to give you a legitimate reason to be flushing toilet.
(alarm goes of) *beep beep beep*
(think to yourself) "hmmm....another piss fat. time for married sex"
married sex by screaming axe wound February 6, 2010

The Married Man & 13day Sex Slave 

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Long ago a man was by himself he had no woman,but occasional fuck girl he knew through charity work in a shop.He said he

works with young people.She kept showing

up at his even when it was clear he didn't want her to.One day he met a woman who could

hold her own she's feisty & fulla fire he likes what he sees,but she pays no attention to him checking her out.This woman turned down 3 guys 2yrs before the man was lucky he got the time of day.They later talked & hit it off after

they were never apart.Yrs later ENGAGED all happy for them.Then big day WOW we all witnessed the beautiful union unfortunately

his inability to RAM the meat became a problem very lazy due to certain things,but the man a phony appeared to be meeting the gullible young girl believing she would fix his problem worse is it was all happening at his home I was aware of this & I even got blamed for stuff which break up mine & his wife friendship. The Sex Slave was there for 12 days or more & stays said he didn't want her to as it was just a fuck,but she always stays guilt is killing me don't know what to do his wife is loyal & good woman they married in the eyes of God he'll never have another woman like her. Marriage is sacred🙏🏽What God hath joined together let no man put asunder(Mathew 19:6)Marriage is of God🙏🏽I hold the playing cards to mashup his life.Right now his WIFE has all the power.The Sex Slave is just a SLUT who has no respect for women or herself. I could tell his family make it right.
SKUTTA
The Married Man & 13day Sex Slave
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