kleptomaniac

A Kleptomaniac is a person who is afflicted with Kleptomania, a compulsion to repeatedly steal "worthless" items, such as keychains and small fruit.

It is unclear whether it is due to depression, or people who are seeking more control of their life, but there are very few cases where diagnosed kleptomaniacs have stolen expensive items along the lines of jewelry and automobiles.

Winona Ryder was caught shoplifting several times at a grocery store, and is believed to be a kleptomaniac.

by David Salberg April 27, 2006

kleptomaniac

a muthafucka that just can't seem to keep their hands of of other people's shyt. For example, a person who goes into Wal*Mart and just has the urgency to open a pack of permanent markers just to steal the red and green ones, or the crazy ass classmate that walks by and blatantly takes your brand spankin' new lead pencil off of your desk.

This kleptomaniac bastard just walked by and took my damn napkin...

by 20Breezy09 May 8, 2009

Kleptomaniac

A clever individual who shoplifts objects frequently from places of retail. Especially for someone they take interest in.

TJ is my favorite kleptomaniac, he stole this watch for me, I wear it everyday.

by Nikki828 March 22, 2017

Kleptomaniac

Someone who cannot resist taking a souvenir from every new place he/she visits. It can be something as simple as a pen of lollipop from a bank, ranging to a pair of wangster shorts belonging to a boy from another team at a track/cross country meet. Kleptomaniacs are known to make up codenames for stolen items and their owners. also for excessive giggling.

(Cassie and Annie enter XC bus, giggling.)
Annie: Hey, you guys didn’t hear any weird noises, did you?
Cassie: Yea, your mom made some crazy noises last night!
Monkey Face: No… why?
Annie: I will tell you later. Not in front of Britter.
Guillerno: Were you guys looking at trees?
Britter: Trees? Don’t you mean flags? (cackles maniacally)
All: NO! What are you talking about, Victor?
Coach: Yea, Victor, what ARE you talking about?
(All laugh at Britter’s silliness.)
(Later, on bus ride home, with Britter safely terrorizing middle’uns.)
Monkey Face: Okay, what is it?
Annie: Hold on. (lifts up shirt)
Monkey Face: Whaaaat? Oh my GOSH!
(A traffic cone has been revealed under Annie’s seemingly preggers belly.)
(Cassie and Annie cackle maniacally.)
Monkey Face: Yalls are serious Kleptomaniacs, dawg.

by Anelisa (Clepto4Life) December 29, 2008

Kleptomaniac

Kleptomaniac is a serial burglar. They wear a mask covering their eyes, making them look like a raccoon. Some have even been known to wear no mask, and enjoy lying, especially if they're a hairy female.
Officer, I found this beer, on the sidewalk. It was a pity, not to drink it.

What's you're name?
Waldo Lily Trudeau.

Actor's make the best kleptomaniac's. They get alot of practice at it. Politicians love them.

by Iam not Elmer Fudd September 6, 2020

Kleptomaniac

Someone who cannot always help stealing, nordo they always need to.

Brandon: Because they are a Kleptomaniac they may get feelings of joy from stealing that they cannot get from other ways.

Parker: Okay so? I don't want all my stuff stolen.

by AshtonTheTrashCan November 16, 2021

Kleptomaniac

Women who steal relatively small things such as earrings, glasses or the occasional banana from self checkouts.

You see that kleptomaniac Aimee stealing earrings from shoppers self checkout again?

by User7373 April 13, 2025