Skip to main content

Jockanese Breakfast 

Jockanese Breakfast: Pronounced "(/dʒɑkənɛs/'bɹɛkfəst/ )" is a typical Scottish dish usually served in place of a typical British fry up. It is most commonly found in the anvil of the British Empire aka Glesga aka GLASGOW and is the only thing that unites Rangers fans and Celtic fans.

A Jockanese Breakfast is like cereal in that it is eaten out of a bowl with a spoon and has that crunchyness to it. Before we get into the recipe, do not give it to any Sassanach for the English will grandslam everywhere after a few bottles of bucky It consists of:
Hundreds of 10mg Diazepam blues
Buckfast, Kestrel or Skol (or all 3 if you're a true Scotsman) in place of milk
OPTIONAL: Heroin dust but you'll be that munted from all the other shite you won't need it; besides, it is best to save it and stretch it out till dole day.
"HO, hae ye seen mah bus ticket? am needin' it tae gang tae jobcentre tae git mah bru sae ah kin git mah jockanese breakfast doon me"
Urban Dictionary Merch
Your favorite words on things you can wear, drink from, read, or give to a friend.
The Urban Dictionary Store sells gifts you’ll have to explain.
More from Urban Dictionary

piddlefart

verb. To waste time doing nothing.
Instead of doing my homework, I decided to piddlefart around for two hours.
piddlefart by Rene April 25, 2005
Word of the Day on October 9, 2026
anyone who succeeds in disgracing/over indulging themselves in the throws of clubland
28 hours and 4 clubs later, gurning for england but still refusing to go home - a total wrongun!!
wrongun by bevvers March 21, 2007
Word of the Day on October 8, 2026

square grouper

Nickname given to bales of marijuana thrown overboard or out of airplanes. Origin is reportedly from members of the US Coast Guard in the area of Southern Florida.
"Base we've got some square groupers floating outside of Miami harbor."
square grouper by slipsheet November 6, 2004
Word of the Day on October 7, 2026
A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.
"Hey, do you know that girl Sally?"

"Yeah, she's kind of annoying. All she ever talks about it ballet."

"Wow, what a Bunhead."

"Hey Sally, you want to hang out this weekend?"
"I can't, I have dance."
"You're such a Bunhead."

"Yeah... I know."
Bunhead by Jen00 October 24, 2014
Word of the Day on October 6, 2026

trucker's tan 

A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.
I had a trucker's tan after driving for 10 straight hours on a sunny day.
Word of the Day on October 5, 2026
The phenomenon where adults salivate at children's toys
Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!
kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025
Word of the Day on October 4, 2026
Load more