Grief Wank

The act of masturbating in a time of great sadness or melancholy, often thought to be a remedy for such feelings. However, they are mostly counterproductive, often self-affirming the loneliness of the participant "at hand".

I'm really struggling getting over Emily recently", "Oh yeah? That sucks", "Last night, I tried a Grief Wank to help me out, y'know?", "I see, how did that go?", "...J..just hug me man, I'm dying here

Grief Wank by Merjiba April 13, 2011

griefwankage 

Excessive masturbation in the wake of a failed relationship that had ended before one received "the booty"

Paul will partake in so much griefwankage once that abstinent skank breaks up with him.

griefwankage by Alphonso Gibralti July 31, 2008

griefwank 

Excessive masturbation that occurs after a breakup.

Paul griefwanked all night after she broke up with him.

griefwank by Pex April 22, 2006

Griefwankers 

People that are easily influenced by the media to embrace false grief and play on it.

Look at Bob and Sue over there live on the bbc, outside Buckingham palace, what a sad pair of griefwankers mourning a dead rich yoda they never knew!

Griefwankers by anonymous September 14, 2022