Dry Robe Wanker

A person wearing a Dry Robe for something other than its intended use, such as on the school run, watching outdoor sport events, or shopping in Waitrose.

Usually associated but not limited to middle-class white British women.

“I love your new Dry Robe, Florence! Have you just been for a swim in the sea?”

“Oh gosh no, I’ve just dropped Harvey off for his Tennis lesson and now I’m off down to John Lewis”

*mutters* “ok, Dry Robe Wanker”

by Smatch November 23, 2024

dryrobe wanker

The dryrobe wanker (DRW) title is attributed to an individual who dons a dryrobe to project an image that they might partake in water sport related hobbies such as open water swimming, triathlon or paddling boarding. The unfortunate reality is in the majority of cases these caped crusaders live in land locked counties miles from a significant body of open water, and are more likely to be perusing the weekly deals in middle of Lidl. The predominant use for these quilted changing robes are more often than not either childcare related, or walking for their dog in it's colour matched dryrobe jacket. DRW evangelists ensure they conform to the pre-requisite outfit of beanie hat, DR and Crocs (usually in sport mode), with the ultra committed sporting a Volkswagen T series van with Dryrobe seatcovers. The less overt DRW is likely to favour the urban camo design to fly under the radar in public.

"Look Shazney, there's a pair of pink crocs walking themselves into Lidl '"

"Holy shit Carmel, look closer, that's one of them dryrobe wanker in a camo cape, owners gone into full predator mode"

by Gordon is a moron December 2, 2024