Canyon Collective
A cult masquerading as a canyoneering forum.
Needless to say, most of the cult members have been brainwashed into believing things that are not true, and tricked into doing things that greatly restrict their personal freedom. In spite of this, Canyon Collective cult members seem to find great fulfillment in limiting what they can say or do.
Needless to say, most of the cult members have been brainwashed into believing things that are not true, and tricked into doing things that greatly restrict their personal freedom. In spite of this, Canyon Collective cult members seem to find great fulfillment in limiting what they can say or do.
Free Thinker: "Hey man, how was canyoneering last weekend?"
Cult Member: "I'm not allowed to say."
Free Thinker: "Uh... OK. Did you post any pictures of your trip on FaceBook?"
Cult Member: "The Leader of the Canyon Collective said nobody should do that."
Free Thinker: "That is strange. Why not?"
Cult Member: "The Leader said that sharing photos will lure thousands to His precious canyons. The unwashed masses are not worthy of entry. They would unquestionably destroy His canyons."
Free Thinker: "I don't think that is true. Most canyons stay the same year after year regardless of traffic."
Cult Member: "The Leader might view you as evil. He might tell me not to be friends with you."
Free Thinker: "Dude, that is messed up! Well... can you take me through the canyons that you just did?"
Cult Member: "Yes, of course! Obviously!! However, you must never tell anyone about them. Plus anyone that you take through has to swear to only show those canyons and never tell anyone about them."
Free Thinker: "But then you will have to monitor what I do with the route information until the end of time... and I in turn will have to monitor what my friends do with the route information. That sounds like a lot of needless drama."
Cult Member: "Whatever The Leader says is the best way. The only way. I love The Leader. I will obey."
Free Thinker: "Fuck that! I'll just figure out where you went, then enjoy my adventure like a normal person. See ya around, nutjob!"
Cult Member: "I'm not allowed to say."
Free Thinker: "Uh... OK. Did you post any pictures of your trip on FaceBook?"
Cult Member: "The Leader of the Canyon Collective said nobody should do that."
Free Thinker: "That is strange. Why not?"
Cult Member: "The Leader said that sharing photos will lure thousands to His precious canyons. The unwashed masses are not worthy of entry. They would unquestionably destroy His canyons."
Free Thinker: "I don't think that is true. Most canyons stay the same year after year regardless of traffic."
Cult Member: "The Leader might view you as evil. He might tell me not to be friends with you."
Free Thinker: "Dude, that is messed up! Well... can you take me through the canyons that you just did?"
Cult Member: "Yes, of course! Obviously!! However, you must never tell anyone about them. Plus anyone that you take through has to swear to only show those canyons and never tell anyone about them."
Free Thinker: "But then you will have to monitor what I do with the route information until the end of time... and I in turn will have to monitor what my friends do with the route information. That sounds like a lot of needless drama."
Cult Member: "Whatever The Leader says is the best way. The only way. I love The Leader. I will obey."
Free Thinker: "Fuck that! I'll just figure out where you went, then enjoy my adventure like a normal person. See ya around, nutjob!"
Canyon Collective by OMG BootboyLostAnotherGerbil?? April 5, 2019
Words you can keep
