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answering machine 

An electronic device which is designed to automatically answer your phone calls. People who are too cheap to get voice mail usually have an answering machine.
I got rid of my answering machine and got voice mail instead.
answering machine by Qbert August 22, 2003

Answering Machine Actress 

Commonly a female who displays her emotions about a voicemail before getting off the phone. Characteristics include hand motions and the use of the word "Whatever" whilst someone is in the vicinity.
"Yo look at the shawty over there. She actin' a fool looking like a Answering Machine Actress."

George Costanza Answering Machine 

A George Costanza Answering Machine is when you record a ridiculous greeting people hear when they call your answering machine. It comes from an episode of "Seinfeld" where George's greeting is himself singing a song off key to avoid talking to his girlfriend.
I HATE calling Paul when he isn't home. He has a George Costanza Answering Machine.

fireplace answering machine bullshit 

n.- anything that sucks or is completely pointless.
I'm sick of all the fireplace answering machine bullshit paypal puts you through to create an account.

Zombie Answering Machine

"Brrrtzzzzt! Hello? Hello? Are you there? Pick up!"