A Crunch

A Crunch is a serious bowel movement. A bowel movement so fierce and powerful that it becomes less of a simple action and more of an event. One's day can be completely centered around the acting of a crunch, such a time is referred to as Crunch Time.

Nick: Oh God...

Justin: What?

Nick: I feel it coming...

Justin: What?

Nick: OMG! Where's your bathroom?!

Justin: Over there...why?

Nick: It's coming!

Justin: What's coming?!

Nick: A CRUNCH!

by Totallynotchris March 27, 2010

crack a crunch

Take a shit.

Man, I gotta crack a crunch.

Don't go in there, I just cracked a crunch.

by Hexis August 20, 2008

Bust a crunch

To take a dump, bake a loaf, do a deuce. In plain English: to poop.

Hold on a minute guys, I gotta bust a crunch!

by Torrential Equilibrium October 23, 2005

cut a crunch

To poop, as in go to the bathroom.

I have to cut a crunch before we leave, don't worry, it should be less than 5 minutes.

by GavinT March 19, 2008

Sir Sir Francis Loganallahan Black-a-Crack Nashville Bunch-a-Crunch King III

Martin Luther King Jr.'s rich white cousin

"I heard Sir Sir Francis Loganallahan Black-a-Crack Nashville Bunch-a-Crunch King III wasn't even sad about his cousin's death!"
"Yeah, what a selfish prick!"

by Canned_Ice July 28, 2019

drop a crunch

To recount an unbelievable but true story, usually of a sexual nature.

Mike -- Dude. You are NEVER going to believe what happened last night!
Chuck -- What happened, man?
Mike -- Do you remember....Tracy? I woke up to her GETTING NAKED AND JUMPING IN MY BED.
Steve -- No way! Way to drop a crunch on us, man!

by tidetogo March 26, 2008

Crunch-a-tize me

The journey begins as one partner (must be a male) sticks Cap'n Crunch brand cereal to his own genitals. He then slides his newly made "sexual breakfast bar" into the anus of his partner (could be male, female, or anything with a nice sized rectum). The dominant figure, also known as the "Cap'n", thrusts his tasty treat in and out of his partner until he fills their insides with milky love. The act is completed as the soggy cereal is released into a bowl and consumed by the Cap'n and his partner.

"Crunch-a-tize me" Max begged, and I did as he asked. It was a thrilling experience for both of us

by therealCap'nCrunch May 31, 2015