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E'Tards

London based football team who have unbelievable tekkers. A team comparable to E'tards will have a large squad and the manager will rotate the team around a core group of players. An E'tarded football team will also call upon reserve players more accustomed to other sports e.g. rugby. It has been reported that the current squad (2010/2011 season) have a combined value of approximately £100. Often play in a 4-4-2 diamond formation. The team have a large fan base who follow the team religiously whether at home or on the road and turnout to see derby games has often led to pitch invasions and fans even getting down onto the touch line to catch mere glimpses of the skill the players possess. Commonly known as the Tards.
Football player 1 "We are playing the E'tards this week."

Football player 2 "Well then, I'm not turning up, that game is as good as lost."

Football manager of a team that has E'tarded traits "Right we are missing some players this week, we'll have to draft in some player from the local rugby club"

Football supporter (While at an E'tard game) "Wow see those tekkers"
E'tard supporter "Yeh, they are quite good. They have scored with chips from the D, backheels and even from the halfway line. They even volleyed it into their own net once just for fun. Big up the Tards"
Football supporter "Wow, they sound good, wouldn't want to play the."
by Footy fan 5201184 March 21, 2011
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Tward

When you can't decide whether a person is a twat or a retard
s/he is a serious tward!
by Stu-Wee August 24, 2009
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Tward

1. A 'Twilight' fanatic who is being exceedingly annoying. or 2. A Twilight fanatic who happens to be on a long rant about Twilight or anything related to Twilight.
(Sometimes both definitions can be used at once)
by Basil Dealer November 29, 2009
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TARDS

TARDS is an acronym for Trump Alternate Reality Disinformation Syndrome.
Sarah: No, Trump did not call Tim Cook Tim Apple, that is fake news.

George: Sorry Sarah, I saw him say it you just suffer from a bad case of TARDS.
by feetoid March 12, 2019
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going towards the ceiling

Person One: "You know Jimmy?"
Person Two: "Yeah, the guy who lost his family in a fire and is crazily depressed?"
Person One: "Well now he lost his job and his only remaining possession is a shotgun."
Person Two: "That's going towards the ceiling."
by Tammy McShammerson May 22, 2010
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The Tards

A gigantic family of awesome people.
Man they're so The Tards!
by TardMommy. November 7, 2010
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Sleepy Tards

That feeling you get from lack of sleep for an extended period of time, that makes everything you say stupid and everything you hear hilarious.
"I've been up for 24 hours and I think the sleepy tards are setting in, because my brain isn't functioning properly."
by jdwiggs July 3, 2014
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