Corporate bulimia

Corporate bulimia is when companies grow uncontrollably then inevitably layoff people when they miss their growth forecasts. They "binge" via aggressive hiring, acquisitions and mergers, only to then "purge" via planned and unplanned mass layoffs. Results in a perpetually demoralized, depressed and anxious staff of survivors who then repeat the process until eventually the company goes bankrupt or is sold for parts. Rarely a company actually survives this cycle, thereafter attempting to appear healthy to outsiders while employees continue to suffer in silence. The term is an analogy comparing the neurotic growth of companies to the devastating illness bulimia nervosa, an eating disorder. All-too-often found in vainglorious Silicon Valley growth-focused companies.

"Another ten thousand wage slave layoffs were announced today in the latest rounds of corporate bulimia."

by GarethBeaumains August 15, 2023

Corporate Circle Jerk

(1) When a company makes a change to its structure, platform, or logo to bandwagon political correctness. This is to virtue signal and/or make good their past misdeeds, but realistically it was all for raising revenue through marketing.

While proclaiming their altruism and stroking their egos, the businessmen at the top stroke something else at a corporate circle jerk knowing fully well that dollar bills are about to rain down on them.

Person 1:

Did you know it's June already?

Person 2:
When did you find out?

Person 1:
All the major brands changed their logos.

Person 2:
*sighs* The corporate circle jerk is upon us.

by Baron von Beuge August 20, 2023

Corporatism

Not to be confused with corporatocracy, which is rule by multinational corporations (what we live in). Corporatism comes from the Greek 'corpus', meaning body. It is the mode of economics used by Fascist Italy, and is shared by many Third Positionists and Fascists alike. Its end goal is a harmonious relationship between employer and employee where both work for the good of the nation rather than for themselves, with the State forming as an intermediary to ensure cooperation.

Phil: "I support corporatism."
Dave: "So you support Disney running the government? Weird."
Phil: "No, I mean I support class collaboration and the organization of society into guilds which cooperate with their employers, using the state as an intermediary."

by Hadrian_7411 October 1, 2023

Corporate rock

When a company hires musicians to make rock and roll.
The rock typically sounds like something you'd hear in a 2000s teen's movie or a commercial.

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Guy 1 "Did you hear that music in the commercial?"

Guy 2 "Yeah, it sounded like Corporate rock, I swore I also heard in some shitty teen's movie"

by dghgt October 19, 2023

Corporate Buisness

To ask someone to have Intercourse in a disgusting or secret way, usually used in a sadistic manner.

“hey Samantha, wanna have some “Corporate Buisness”~?”
“Im calling HR Phil.”

by digbickrandy October 22, 2023

Corporate Eiffel Tower

Noun and verb.

When both your manager and client fuck you over at the same time.

They’re Eiffel Towering you, like the sex position in a threesome, but not in the good way.

Ex. Manager assigns last minute work and client hasn’t sent over what you asked for two weeks ago

Just got corporate Eiffel Towered, fml.

by corporate brand whore October 30, 2023

corporatism

Diametrically opposed to liberal laissez-faire and Marxist central planning; provides balance in labor relations, consequently combating the precariousness of work (proletarianization) as well as the unbridled accumulation of capital and usury. It is a spiritual organization of production and consumption that is qualitative rather than quantitative. Therefore, aristocratic hierarchies dismantle bourgeois plutocracies.

True corporatism is the organic basis of common interests.

by tradical October 31, 2023