An infernal peninsula, jutting out the southeast edge of the U.S.A. like a disgusting tumour. It consists mainly of weak people from the Northeast and Midwest who left classy, excellent areas like New York, Chicago, or Connecticut, their children who were raised here or forced here and are getting out at the first opportunity possible, native Floridians who are a bunch of miserable hicks and wear camo jackets and crap to high school, and immigrants who stay here because this is where they happen to be, and would probably get out very quickly if they found out what the rest of the country has to offer.
The political system of the State is atrocious. There's no income tax, so the State Gov't. gets all its money from sales and real-estate tax. This has many effects.
For example, the educational-system condemns the poor children of this State to recieve a quality of education and schooling that would be considered remarkable sub-par for such a developed country. Class sizes are commonly 35+ and even hit 40 quite commonly, and the teachers are paid such rubbish that many have to live with their parents or rely on their spouse for monetary support. Low pay results in many highly-capable individuals to be turned away from the job. So teacher quality is some of the worst you will find anywhere in the country.
The government having no money also results in a wait time of at least two to three weeks for power if a hurricane hits you. The hurricane months of August-October can easily get as hot as in the middle of the summer, so this situation results in the utter misery of picking rotten food out of the fridge, begging for the power to come back for the A/C to give you some release.
Oh and if a road is being built, take your estimate of how long it'll take to build, and triple it, and you're heading in the right direction.
With anything funded by the State government, just expect the worst every time, in any category, whether education, infrastructure, management, incompetence is the norm. Just come to expect it.
As for natural beauty, there is nothing to be found here. Florida literally has the flattest, most dull landscape, of anywhere you will see in the entire country. Kansas may be flat too, but at least it's scenic in it's own way, Florida is just a huge, swampy sandbar that was developed on for the masochists who moved here. The natural vegetation is just a mix of swampy shrubs and trees adapted for the muggy climate. Entirely dull and uninteresting.
The weather is also, yes, too hot. If you want a nice climate, you don't have to go to the muggiest place in the country. People in cold climates think they want one extreme instead of the other, but never realise somewhere in the middle makes more sense. There's too hot, and too cold, and Florida is too hot. There's no variety to the seasons, just one, sunny and muggy. Or rainy and muggy sometimes. The only bearable months of the year are perhaps December-February. The snowbirds often come during these months, and mistakenly come to believe that the weather is tolerable year around, and get stuck here.
The political system of the State is atrocious. There's no income tax, so the State Gov't. gets all its money from sales and real-estate tax. This has many effects.
For example, the educational-system condemns the poor children of this State to recieve a quality of education and schooling that would be considered remarkable sub-par for such a developed country. Class sizes are commonly 35+ and even hit 40 quite commonly, and the teachers are paid such rubbish that many have to live with their parents or rely on their spouse for monetary support. Low pay results in many highly-capable individuals to be turned away from the job. So teacher quality is some of the worst you will find anywhere in the country.
The government having no money also results in a wait time of at least two to three weeks for power if a hurricane hits you. The hurricane months of August-October can easily get as hot as in the middle of the summer, so this situation results in the utter misery of picking rotten food out of the fridge, begging for the power to come back for the A/C to give you some release.
Oh and if a road is being built, take your estimate of how long it'll take to build, and triple it, and you're heading in the right direction.
With anything funded by the State government, just expect the worst every time, in any category, whether education, infrastructure, management, incompetence is the norm. Just come to expect it.
As for natural beauty, there is nothing to be found here. Florida literally has the flattest, most dull landscape, of anywhere you will see in the entire country. Kansas may be flat too, but at least it's scenic in it's own way, Florida is just a huge, swampy sandbar that was developed on for the masochists who moved here. The natural vegetation is just a mix of swampy shrubs and trees adapted for the muggy climate. Entirely dull and uninteresting.
The weather is also, yes, too hot. If you want a nice climate, you don't have to go to the muggiest place in the country. People in cold climates think they want one extreme instead of the other, but never realise somewhere in the middle makes more sense. There's too hot, and too cold, and Florida is too hot. There's no variety to the seasons, just one, sunny and muggy. Or rainy and muggy sometimes. The only bearable months of the year are perhaps December-February. The snowbirds often come during these months, and mistakenly come to believe that the weather is tolerable year around, and get stuck here.
by d.c.r. September 15, 2009
Get the Florida mug.A nice place to visit but not live!
Population of nearly dead and newly weds.
For those of us unfortunate souls who were born and raised there its the worst state.
There are 4 sections to Fl; Panhandle -beach, N./Central Fl-southern, Miami (305)- lil cuba, S. Fl- money.
There are only two seasons hot and hotter.
Any education below college level sucks, but if you must go to school there Seminole county is on top.
Your either a Gator or Seminole, no one but Miamians care about U of M.
As for the beaches, the alantic beaches are by far the best, the gulf beaches are nice if you like to feel like your swimming in a warm bath with red tide.
The only exception to that is Sanibel Island beaches, they are like heaven on earth.
The only reason non-floridians say we can't drive is b/c we drive like we have shit to do. Those of you who like to do the speed limit need to move the fuck over, some of us have things to get done, and don't be jealous b/c we can multitask while we drive. I learned how to drive while on the phone! Also if you miss your turn or exit go to the next one and turn around don't cut from the left-hand lane to the right just so you can make your turn..Some of us are trying not to die!
True Floridians don't go to disney everyday b/c we hate tourist.
NO, alligators do not walk around in your backyard unless you live in a swamp.
Not everyone has a pool, and no we don't go to the beach everyday. Not everyone lives on the coast.
For those idiots who don't know Tallahassee is the capitol not Miami.
Florida is of Native American origin, with some spanish influence.
Yes there is a place called Yee-haw junction.
As for FLO RIDA..its pernounced FLORIDA and your fucking form Tallahassee...woopdi fuck doo!
Population of nearly dead and newly weds.
For those of us unfortunate souls who were born and raised there its the worst state.
There are 4 sections to Fl; Panhandle -beach, N./Central Fl-southern, Miami (305)- lil cuba, S. Fl- money.
There are only two seasons hot and hotter.
Any education below college level sucks, but if you must go to school there Seminole county is on top.
Your either a Gator or Seminole, no one but Miamians care about U of M.
As for the beaches, the alantic beaches are by far the best, the gulf beaches are nice if you like to feel like your swimming in a warm bath with red tide.
The only exception to that is Sanibel Island beaches, they are like heaven on earth.
The only reason non-floridians say we can't drive is b/c we drive like we have shit to do. Those of you who like to do the speed limit need to move the fuck over, some of us have things to get done, and don't be jealous b/c we can multitask while we drive. I learned how to drive while on the phone! Also if you miss your turn or exit go to the next one and turn around don't cut from the left-hand lane to the right just so you can make your turn..Some of us are trying not to die!
True Floridians don't go to disney everyday b/c we hate tourist.
NO, alligators do not walk around in your backyard unless you live in a swamp.
Not everyone has a pool, and no we don't go to the beach everyday. Not everyone lives on the coast.
For those idiots who don't know Tallahassee is the capitol not Miami.
Florida is of Native American origin, with some spanish influence.
Yes there is a place called Yee-haw junction.
As for FLO RIDA..its pernounced FLORIDA and your fucking form Tallahassee...woopdi fuck doo!
by floridachic February 16, 2008
Get the florida mug.Also known as the Sunshine state because of its year round warm weather, florida is a great place to live. It's a pretty common stereotype that florida is filled with snowbirds and old people and that is 100% true. The old people are known for driving 20-30 miles under the speed limit and causing careless car accidents however on the plus side if an old person hits you it's very unlikely anyone will be seriously injured or killed and your car will probably have very little damage because old people don't usually go over 20 mph so you're good. The term "snowbirds" refer to the northerners that visit florida and they wear shorts and sit outside tanning when it's 60 degrees out while the floridians are inside bundled up with the heater on. In florida we get hurricanes all the time and they don't scare us unless their high categories. In fact hurricanes are welcomed because it's a good excuse to have a day off and hurricane parties are pretty typical down here. The weather in florida is extremely bipolar it's typical for it to pour really hard for 2 minutes and then have completely clear skies minutes later. Winter doesn't really exist in florida especially in south florida where it will occasionally get below 60 during the day in the winter time but other than that it's pretty much warm year round, Floridians consider below 60 to be freezing and we start bringing out the winter coats and uggs when it gets to that temperature.
by Awesomenessbruhh February 16, 2015
Get the Florida mug.by MoobNaster69 May 31, 2019
Get the Florida mug.tourism & retirement bby. if you go down to orlando, you're either in a theme park or the gettoh. which, coincidentally, can be found within about 45 minutes from anywhere else. most southern are beach towns & it basically becomes cuba. the keys are pretty much orlando via small islands. yes, there are alligators. no, we don't walk to disney every day. the temperature ranges from hot to hotter, although it actually can snow in SOME places very rarely. up in whatever the hell that little place is that isn't america's penis, well. if you live there, you probably can't afford a computer. or you just can't read, so i don't even have to explain. along the mid-coast is actually pretty normal, although were lucky, as we can go to the beach ANNNYYYYYtime. which, yeah, everyone does. all the houses are fucking spanish-style, which drives anyone north of the carolina's insane ("this looks like a mexican resteraunt...") and every single thing has palm trees and pastel colors on it. 3/4 people are probably elders. most people are pretty tan all the time. or sunburned. whatever. nobody likes the cops here. or the "endangered" birds, which convientiently land in front of the car when you're running late, and only then, while hitting them is illegal. ("they don't seem too fucking endangered, they never leave!") education is sitting in a non-air conditioned classroom with a teacher that hates you as much as you hate them. everyone honestly thinks orlando is the capitol. there are way too many people "passionate" about the gators. the daytona 500 isn't really a big deal. drugs are crazy, as well as "gettoh" kids that think living outside of a gated community is hardcore. ("welcome to the gunshine state muthurrr.") shut up and drink you're orange juice, YOU'RE IN FLORIDA!
by katharine? March 15, 2008
Get the florida mug.A state that used to be cool but now just sucks total ass. All the leftists moved out there and now it's like California. Florida is where Millennial yuppies go to work and pretend to be VIP. Only the old retired population votes right-wing. It is growing fast, faster than Georgia; and the Millennials will soon make it a Pinko-Marxist shithole. You thought California or Seattle was arrogant? Floridians are becoming arrogant as fuck, too. Also, the traffic is horrible. A lot of people are dying in car accidents out there.
Florida used to be a really cool laid-back state. Now it's filled with arrogant liberal entitled snobs from all over. Who just move out there to party and impress people with their fake superficial lives. Casey Anthony. Tampa is the worst city, they are all perverts and sleep around.
by Abraham's Adversary June 21, 2018
Get the Florida mug.A good place to live. Some places are bad but it's the same in every state.
The weather is usually just sun and rain. Hurricanes, tornadoes, and lightning are usually what you have to worry about from early summer through early fall. It gets cold, but definitely not as cold as what others in the US are used to. It snowed decades ago, and when it did, it was less than an inch and gone by sun rise.
Also, the majority of its bad drivers are teens and seniors, which is unfortunate since if you're a good driver, you'll probably be blamed for their mess.
Its education system is terrible, but some schools are great.
The weather is usually just sun and rain. Hurricanes, tornadoes, and lightning are usually what you have to worry about from early summer through early fall. It gets cold, but definitely not as cold as what others in the US are used to. It snowed decades ago, and when it did, it was less than an inch and gone by sun rise.
Also, the majority of its bad drivers are teens and seniors, which is unfortunate since if you're a good driver, you'll probably be blamed for their mess.
Its education system is terrible, but some schools are great.
by Floridian23 August 6, 2007
Get the florida mug.