alaskan dildo

a sexual fetish involving shitting into an open condom, freezing it, and then proceeding to penetrate your lover with this sex toy

put shit into a condom thus being an alaskan dildo

by Ken Christensen November 2, 2007

Anything's a dildo if you try hard enough

Meaning if you really really really want, you could shove anything up your rectum or vagina. If you're horny enough, you can (and will) use anything as a masturbatory tool.

You were masturbating with a pizza? How is that even possible???
- Anything's a dildo if you try hard enough!

by Desmond G. April 13, 2014

dildo jack-off

A dildo jack-off is the preferred masturbation technique my cadet roomie uses to give a cumgasm -- he fucks me with a 10" dildo up my boy-hole, and jacks me off until I have a cumgasm, while he's fucking me with the dildo and I'm sucking his dick.

My cadet roomie gave me a dildo jack-off, and we both enjoy it -- I was sucking a cumgasm out of him, and enjoying being fucked as I blew my load!

by USAF Cadet October 18, 2020

dildo pilot

An indiviual who pilots dildos, normally a homosexual.

Did you see that guy with the pink polo shirt with the popped collar? He's such a dildo pilot.

by Joe January 25, 2005

dildo

The supreme icon of male obsolescence in today's society. Once a woman gets a taste of the right one, she never puts up with male bullshit again. Hard when we want it, long as we like it, goes as long as we do, provides instant fantasy support so we can imagine ourselves being fucked HARD AND LONG by hot-and-sexy anybody we want to be by instead of that dumb twat swaggering around thinking he's the center of our life and about to get dumped, no wet spot, no HIV, no other woman, no other man, no backtalk, no bullshit, and when you're done with it you can dump it in a drawer and it's out of your face - no fucking phone calls, last minute date requests or sassing. To be gotten at the sex toy shop near you, and the good ones are about $100-150. Small price to pay for peace of mind, yo. GIRL, GET THAT DILDO TODAY AND WATCH YOUR SON OF A BITCH SOON TO BE EX BOYFRIEND START TO SWEAT WITH REAL FEAR.

They pretend to like it, but they don't really. Just think, a thick slab of latex gets your pussy more than they ever will. I bought mine and am NEVER looking back. And right here let's kill the myth we ladies choose dildos because "no one else would fuck us". WTF? You're on crack, you male bitches. I turn you down all the time. WE USE DILDOS BECAUSE THEY'RE BETTER THAN YOU AND BRING LESS BULLSHIT. GOSPEL TRUTH. GET SCHOOLED.

"What the fuck do I need YOU for? I've got A DILDO that makes you look like the soft bitch you are. Get the fuck out of my house, you saggy balled twat. Technology has made your ass REDUNDANT."

by HSFATTACK September 19, 2006

Dildo that slipped through the cracks

A total fuck head.

I'm not going to lie to you, this douchebag is the dildo that slipped through the cracks.

by Sheldon January 24, 2004

dildo

Adjective used when something sucks.

"This idea is dildos"

by keep america great November 19, 2007