One who thinks they rule a public restroom, and rudely wait for you to get out of a stal. They do this by asking questions, whistling loudly, knockin on the stall door, telling children you'll be out soon, and otherwise stalling the delicate process of public defecation. Often found at camping sites.
Dude, I had to take a massive crap, but I just couldn't let it out! The Turd Burglar kept strutting around the bathroom and asking when I'd be out.
by PurebredGamer March 25, 2007
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A thief of human excrement - based on an historical relevance
Wealthy chinese citizens during the ninth and tenth century would sprinkle gold dust on their food as a sign of extreme wealth but also as they believed it provided healing powers. Lesser citizens lived in the catacombs below the city and stole the released excrement to extract its valuable cargo.
by Craig Murphy June 2, 2005
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one who steals or has a great obsession with turds
sick, get away from me turd burglar!
by bill cosby November 21, 2002
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Forget the other definitions, a "turd burglar" is in fact, a toilet.
You sit, and it burgles the turds from your sphincter.
Ok let's go!

Hang on, I gotta go to the turd burglar first.

(15 minutes later)

Awesome, I'm all ready! My ass has been proper burgled.
by wild nothing June 19, 2012
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a person u comes in the middle of the nite with a plunger and steals ur turds out of ur toilet
YOur such a turd burglar
by gretchen August 31, 2003
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