professional meat handler

A gal who sleeps around and handles lots of man sausage.

Dude! Maggies such a professional meat handler I bet fucking her is like throwing a hot dog down a hall way.

Dude! That bitch is such a professional meat handler I bet she's got the gag reflex of a blow up doll.

Dude! Dude she's such a professional meat handler I bet she's handled more sausage than Jimmy Dean!

by Attica1979 October 7, 2007

Pamela Handerson

My right hand with which I stroke.

I had sex last night with Pamela Handerson.

by rocketman January 30, 2005

Arabian Handkerchief

The act of blowing one's nose into a female's beef curtains.

Me having a cold and her loose vagina, combined with a mutual love for foreplay, lead to an Arabian handkerchief to start off our lovemaking.

by Benjamin W. Newport January 3, 2008

she's left-handed

A punchline to a popular joke involving a man and his wife who asks him a purely hypothetical question, "If I died, would you remarry". The punchline, for those of you who don't get it, is explained at the very bottom of the example.

A young married couple are taking a nice stroll down a long and rather winding road. There was a long way till they got home and there was plenty of time to have a long drawn-out conversation, so the wife decided to ask her husband a question she had on her mind for a long time:
Wife: "If I died, would you remarry."
Husband: "No, I love you too much to get married to a different woman."
Wife: "But you love being married, don't you? So honestly. You'd get remarried wouldn't you?"
Husband: *sigh* "Yeah, I guess I would get remarried eventually"
Wife: "Would you and your new wife live in our house?"
Husband: "Yeah, where else would we live"
Wife: "Would you take down all the pictures of me and you together?"
Husband: "Yeah, it would be very discourteous to her not to. I'd still keep the ones of me and you in my private drawer"
Wife: "Would you two sleep in our bedroom?"
Husband: "Yeah, where else would we sleep?"
Wife: "Would she use my golf clubs?"
Husband: "No, she wouldn't be able to. She's left-handed!"
Wife: ...
Husband: "SHIT!"
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explanation
Him saying that she's left-handed implies he already has someone to get remarried with, meaning he's been cheating on his wife.

by Barnakey August 19, 2006

Goblin Hanger

also known as a wrinkly old dick bag. testicles

When that old dude bent over, his goblin hanger was swaying in the wind. It was magical.

by Shaun Bingham January 4, 2009

Tard Handler

one who watches over tards to make sure they don't fuck themselves in the head with other tard's penis'.

if it hadn't have been for that tard handler, i would have never spent that year in college.

by YAAAYYY!!!! July 19, 2004

one handed popcorn eater

a man or woman who goes to see a movie purely to pleasure themselves

dude, that guy is a one handed popcorn eater i just got jizz on my neck

by manfat June 28, 2003