Absolute ballshit

An act of unfairness and unpredictability

That’s absolute ballshit! FGR should have won again. Instead FGR decided to hit the woodwork, miss 1 on 1’s and lose

by BURYAREBASTARDS January 20, 2019

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Absolution

Absolution: When you giving it to your wife from behind but you suddenly have the urge to take a big shit and your son comes right on time to swap you and you keep hearing your wife's moans as you lay down the biggest turd of the history of turds

Man 1 : I am so happy I have a family now, used absolution yesterday. Great way to bond more with your son
Man 2: I know its those small things that matter.

by geoxd657 April 13, 2018

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Absolut Value

The value of one's weight in absolut vodka. Multiply weight in lbs by 14.08 (Absolut vodka is roughly 88 cents per ounce).

"See that girl over there, the really skinny one?"
"Oh shit! She is so fucking skinny."
"I bet her absolut value is only 1300"
"I'd say 1200."
"Shiiet."

absolute value absolute vodka absolut vodka

by bennydre April 30, 2013

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Absolute Garden Gnome

That one guy who eats all your food in your fridge with his pants off.
He wack, but he yo homie. you get mad at him but you get over it.
He comes out as gay but he's still your little horny elf.
he sends you dick pics but you still love him.

"You mother fucking absolute garden gnome i hate you come here and suck my dick"

by a3sw4ed5rftijkoplkijuhygtfrdfy October 22, 2020

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Absolute Capital

Absolute Capital - Slang compound word referring to high amounts of wealth usually owned by a person or a company, that often used to describe the amount of money someone is generating off of an action or product.

Jack's making absolute capital off of making homemade RPGs and selling them to children.

by NiggyNiggyMyNigga April 28, 2020

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