lawyer 

1. (n)A profession paid to lie for someone in the name of their "defense".
2. (n)A profession that speaks in semantics and points out technicalities.
3. (n)A person of a profession that uses their education to fight for the little people and help out causes such as civil rights and destroy unjust laws but are sadly trampled over by greedy folks who siphon your money.
4. (n) Someone morally benkrupt who takes your money to help you prove that restaurants are irresponsible if they don't label their money hot and that McDonalds should pay money for America's obesity.
5. (n) A selfish profession that shameful perents want their children to become just because it makes a lot of money.
6. (n) The downfall of this country's society.

Lawyers are the scum of the earth!

lawyer by The Amazing Anonymous One July 10, 2004

Lawyer 

Last career choice available to those with a serious brain injury

Father (to son): What happens if you ride your bike without a helmet?
Son: My head will hit the ground and my brains will fall out.
Father: And then what?
Son: I have to be a lawyer
Father: And we don't want that, do we?
Son (with horror): NNOOOOO!

Lawyer by SkankyHo June 4, 2008

Lawyer 

See: Pure, Undeniable Evil

Lawyers: the cause of all of lifes problems, shame on all the idiot parents that want their kids to become one.

Lawyer by A Gorilla December 30, 2008

lawyer 

1) The person you call when you get caught by the Fiddies (5-0), pigs, or fuzz. Also can be used as a defense when they are asking you questions see Lawyer Up. Note- Its probably best not to play this card immediatly upon being pulled over.
2) a friend of a friend, or a cousin that really didnt go to law school but was arrested once for the same thing.

Ex 1)
Right violating Cop#1: "We are going to search your vehicle?"
Player#1: "Iz be wantin my lawyer first."
Right violating Cop#2: "Don't worry about that shit. Ill just tell the judge I smelled pot in the car and saw some smoke"

Ex 2)
Quick to judge, dont care if hes wrong Cop#1: "We are going to run you down to the station"
Player#2: "My lawyer said this shit aint illegal and yous all cant arrest me for it."

lawyer by Marius M August 25, 2006

Lawyer 

The Enemy of Humanity with a weakness for money and other things they need to live, they hate their clients, white people, people in the German armed services, and they love people that can make them a quick buck or two.

Lawyers are indeed the Enemy of Humanity Destroy them with Pennies!! do do so throw the pennie at them and when the bend over to pick it up run over and steal it from them they turn to ash!

I went to meeet my lawyer one day I had a pennie in my pocket for protection, I walked into the monsters lair (offfice) and said " Hey think fast!" I threw the pennie at him and when he went to grab it I nicked it from him and watched as he turned to dust with a loud yell he said " Give me the pennie or so help me I willl sue you for 500 of them BWAHAHAHAHAHAH!" Isweat dropped at his decleariton then walked to his dest and started to pisss on the ashes.

Lawyer by Fant Nagner (TF) September 18, 2009

lawyer 

See 'Solicitor' for a comprehensive definition

Nobody likes a lawyer, not even lawyers.

lawyer by Master of the Rolls May 30, 2003

lawyer 

The whole common law judicial process is adversarial and hence the lawyers of both sides concentrate on their own argument so the Judge can make an informed decision.

The problem is, one of the lawyers always sucks so the judge receives a very unbalanced view.

Hence, lawyers are selfish bastards only interested in advancing their own case. By doing this, justice gets fucked over because judges can't know everything about the law, that's not their job. And because they don't know every aspect of the law, all you have is lawyers coming down to techinicalities that don't really have shit all to do with justice.

Thank God that their are some judges out there who actually know the law and can smell lawyers and their bullshit from a mile away.

lawyer by RtotheOB May 21, 2005