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fail scale

a scale represented by Failions that measures fail in all matters applied

note: failions can go into negative, as well as be represented by the metric system's notations (kili, mega, giga, et cetera)
Person 1: "How would you grade The Happening on the fail scale?"

Person 2: "About 3.5 kilifailions, what about you?"

Person 1: "I actually liked it, I'd say -7 failions."

Person 2: "You just earned a gigafailion, good job."
by iNhibotor March 20, 2009
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fail clown

A person who fails colossally or is incompetent on a galactic scale , while at the same time not noticing, or, worse, thinks they're doing well.
- Sarah Palin's unending stream of media gaffs during the 2008 election campaign: Palin is such a fail clown - can you believe the answers she gave Katie Couric?

- Kim Jong-Il and the way he is always posturing about how everyone want to attack pitiful North Korea while he starves his own people: Kim Jong-Il, ever the fail clown, starves his people while issuing bizarre threats to the the rest of the world.

- Senator Larry Craig (need I say more about this?).
Fail clown Senator Larry Craig, after getting caught soliciting sex in a men's public restroom, refuses to resign after all.

- Rob Blagojevich, former governor of Illinois (ditto).

Governor Rob Blagojevich, First Fail Clown of Illinios, mounted an stunningly absurd an ineffective public defense of himself while the official impeachment proceedings were underway.
by Riposte June 20, 2009
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Related Words

Fail Cone

A fail cone becomes a fail cone when the ice cream put on a cone fails to look like a good ice cream cone, and instead comes out to be a glob of ice cream on top of a cone.

One who makes a fail cone will never admit that they make a fail cone because they believe that their cone looks great, even though the ice cream is clearly lopsided or not twisted properly. They may also try to cover up the glob with some colorful sprinkles or toppings to distract any other viewers from noticing the fail cone. But do not be deceived, a fail cone still exists even if it is hidden under pretty toppings.

Once pointed out, a fail cone will be eaten very quickly, especially if the one who is planning on eating it was the one who made it.

Note: This term can only be used to describe soft serve ice cream cones.
Customer: "Hey can I get chocolate ice cream on a cone?"
Waiter: "Sure, hold on one moment."
(Waiter hands customer his cone, with the ice cream all in a big glob on top of the cone rather than a nice swirl)
Customer: "What is this? This isn't an ice cream cone! This is a fail cone!"

Person 1: "Hey what do you have there?"
Person 2: "Oh I just made an ice cream cone"
(Person 1 takes a look at the cone: a regular sugar cone, with some ice cream on top, but it is all smooshed, and there is a notable amount of sprinkles on top)
Person 1: "Ice cream cone? More like fail cone!"
by flyingcircus316 July 9, 2009
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Fail Flash

When a female tries to flash someone a part of her body, but fails epically in the process.
"Anna tried to flash some guy she saw on Mill Avenue, but got tangled up in her shirt and tripped over a homeless man."
"--That is what I call a fail flash!"
by tweetlesann June 16, 2009
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Fail Fuel

Used to describe the fuel powering any failed attempt, action, or result.
After a terrible attempt to score a basketball shot:
"Way to use fail fuel on that one."
by stupidcakes June 19, 2009
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Fail Farmer

It means "farming your own fail".

A farmer grows his own food, therefore a fail farmer grows his own fail, meaning he makes a lot of fails upon themselves.

To be called a fail farmer is an insult.
Example 1:
Guy 1: "Wow those guys over there are trying to act all cool."
Guy 2: "Wow, what a bunch of fail farmers."

Example 2:
Guy 1: "Wow these school computers keep shutting down"
Guy 2: "That's because they're a bunch of fail farmers"

Example 3:
Guy 1: "Lol, look at that fail farmer over there"
Guy 2: "Epic fail, he just fell on his face"
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Fail-osophy

An idea or thought brought forth by an individual who believes they are correct and /or smart when actually all their ideas are total bullshit.
Wow, using that thesaurus to sound smarter than you actually are, Huey? Great Fail-osophy.
by L-Marsh September 24, 2010
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