Gah...those chavs really do suck.
You can look at them in two ways; one being the non biased way and te other being the biased. I'm gonna pick the biased way cause chavs just suck ass. And if they don't they want to.
TYPICAL NAMES: Michelle,
Kelly, Brooke, Zoe, Ella ect (nothing too intelectual)or jack, Tom, Chris, Scott (once again, simple.)
AGES: One group can range between 11-15 whilst the other is the older, more 'hardcore' group of 16-
21 year olds.
WHEREABOUTS: Local market, Macdonals,
Police cell, Park, Bus Stop, Police
car, Dodgy 24 hour off-license or in big groups on the highstreet harrassing greebos.
DEFINITIONS:
Female
chav: Straightened hair or hair pulled so
tight its the croyden facelift effect, good skin ONLY because they use like half a pot of stolen concealer, either incredibly skinny or fat but pretends not to be, miniskirt and short tanktop or white tracksuit bottoms and matching tracksuit jacket with a white or baby pink/baby
blue tank-top underneath, nike trainers which are scarily clean, three ear piercing, each with thick gold hoops adorning them, and possibly a diamond earring in the cartalidge. There will be gold rings on each finger, possibly up to 20 on each hand, and numerous amount of necklaces, but one being boyfriends thick gold chain and a moving clown necklace from argos, and not forgetting the essex/london accent that is made worse, and the shouting and the bottle of white lightning and/or beer attached to hand.
Male
Chav: Ew. There is a choice of a skinhead with a little bit of stubble or spikey hair if your white, but if your black its either skinhead or cornrows. White tracksuits ONLY, and wollen socks that the trousers are tucked into and the perma white trainers on show. Only one diamond earring is required, and if they are old enough some form of stubble is grown, and finally, a deep voice, which doesnt matter about the accent but cocnkey or Essex is usually known in male chavs but less important for them to maintain, unlike female chavs.
CARRYING: Females carry push chairs wih babies in, or after six pm its a bottle of white lightning or malibu, whilst males deck themselfs with attractive knifes and
baseball bats.
DANGERS: Everything about them. Breathe near one of them and if you ain't a
chav you'll probably get knifed. Best to avoid eye contact with female chavs otherwise they will assume you are 'evilling' them.
LIKES:
female: Baby called
Brooklyn/Romeo/Cassie/Michelle, White ligntning,pure vodka,alcopops, MacDonalds, shouting highpitched, dance
music.
male: Knifes,
Baseball bats, Burberry caps, beer, Shouting at lone greebos, saying innit.
DISLIKES:
Female: Greebos,
Police, not being allowed out to reck havoc.
Male: Greebos.
CONCLUSION: They're just twats in general, thinking
people like them when they really should just jump off the nearest cliff.
