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carpet farming

The act of sifting and inspecting through carpet in hopes of finding pieces of meth that you, or someone else dropped.

(Like little seeds you planted in carpet and your picking the crops for harvest). But the seeds are shards, and the crops are still shards plus UFO that look like shards.
After carpet farming for almost three days, i almost have enough shards to smoke!
by queenofskitzerland July 2, 2015
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carpet dick

When one excessively has intercourse with a woman with a full metal bush and gets rug burn on their dick.
Him: Damn dude, my side bitch gave me carpet dick! My wiener hurts so damn bad!
by DaggerDick92 June 21, 2017
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Carpet Fairy

Being the female equivalent of a soy boy, a carpet fairy is an extremely feminine lesbian. Carpet fairies can usually be seen drinking a venti frappuccino and gossiping about the latest scandal denoted in the most recent Cosmopolitan article.
Tyler: "Did you see Carla? That outfit she's wearing makes her stand out more than a republican in downtown LA."
Chad: "Yeah, seriously. She's a real carpet fairy."
by Technium February 21, 2018
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Carpetland

A place of business which, despite its idyllic moniker, is staffed by many completely inept annoying passive-aggressive assholes, is open for way too many hours per day, and is basically just fucking Hell on Earth. A Carpetland employee is usually characterized by a complete lack of product knowledge, an inability to relate to other people in a way which is friendly or kind.
"I thought about going to Carpetland, but then I remembered my last visit there; I would rather have red-hot needles jabbed through my eyes and a red hot poker stuck up my ass."
"Man, I went to Carpetland, and the people were complete assholes. FUCK that place!"
by That Dude That Knows September 23, 2020
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Red carpet moment

When a woman has a moment of pure rage caused by her menstrual cycle.
Angie had a red carpet moment when I left the toilet seat up
by nyjyrk January 17, 2010
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College carpet bomb

When you're riding reverse cowgirl, leave a stink trail on there pubis.
I gave your father a proper college carpet bomb last night.
by DonkeyMuff April 2, 2021
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weird_carpet_stain

A trans idiot who is one of my best friends and has over 1000 followers on tiktok
Oh yeah! I know weird_carpet_stain! They’re one of my best friends!
by Reddie is musty June 30, 2021
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