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Do you want to know how I got these scars? 

What the Joker says to people before telling them a story about how he got the scars on the sides of his mouth in The Dark Knight.

The first story involves his drunk father killing his mother, then cutting the sides of his son's mouth with a knife to make it appear as if he is always smiling. This is where the line "Why So Serious?" is said in the movie.

The second story is different, in which he talks about his wife. He states that he puts a razor in his mouth and moves it around, therefore cutting himself, giving himself more scars.
Story 1: Do you want to know how I got these scars? My father was a drinker, and a fiend. And one night he goes off crazier than usual. Mommy gets the kitchen knife to defend herself. He doesn't like that. Not. One. Bit. So, me watching, he takes the knife to her, laughing while he does it. He turns to me, and he says, "Why so serious?" He comes at me with the knife, "Why so serious?" He sticks the blade in my mouth, "Let's put a smile on that face!" And...Why so serious?

Story 2: Well, you look nervous. Is it the scars? Do you wanna know how I got them? C'mere...Hey, look at me...So I had a wife. Beautiful, like you, who tells me I worry too much; who tells me I oughta smile more, who gambles and gets in deep with the sharks. Hey...One day they carve her face. We have no money for surgeries; she can't take it. I just want to see her smile again. Hm? I just want her to know that I don't care about the scars! So, I stick a razor in my mouth and do this to myself. And you know what? She can't stand the sight of me! She leaves. Now I see the funny side. Now i'm always smiling!

Hey mother... want another? 

Something to say to a milf.
"Check out that milf."

"Hey mother... want another?"

No, I don't want to take my pants off 

This is what you say when someone near you is on the phone so whoever they happen to be talking to thinks they were about to get some but then were rejected.
Victim: "Oh, yeah so the other night I was talking to-"
Random person: "No, I don't want to take my pants off!"
Person on the phone: "Who was that..?"
Victim: "Um...."

X Called, they want their Y Back 

This phrase is a derogatory saying that usually denounces someone's style in something. "X" is usually replaced with a time period whom the person's style reflects. "Y" is replaced with the item being made fun of or denounced.

Another permutation of this saying is more common on imageboards, messageboards, and forums. china called...
Examples of X Called, they want their Y Back...

Hey, Justin Bieber called, he wants his singing skills back.
Hey, the 1970s called, they want their clothing back
Hey, Elvis called, he wants his hair back

do you want a vimto chewit lad

a phrase said by someone who wants to give out vimto chewits
Louis: ey

Dom: yo louis

Louis: do you want a vimto chewit lad

Dom: yes lad

do you want to die

the sassier/classier form of the popular phrase "fuck off"

can be used anytime someone around you needs to be taken down a peg due to aggressive or hostile behavior or inappropriate/unwarranted sass

you can exponentially increase the sassiness of this phrase by using it against someone in their own home
Friend A: "Man it must suck to be as ugly as you."

Friend B: "Hey Carl. Do you want to die."