child support

When a parent calls one of his/her children for help when assistance is needed with a computer, cell phone, DVR, etc.

My mom couldn't remember how to open her email so she called me for child support.

by lurchman January 3, 2011

child support

n. Money garnisheed from a father's salary check to help support his children.

Kiersten was so excited to see Tyrone with a child support check (the first in six months), she decided do him a favor and go to bed with him, only to find out later he had impregnated her again.

by Richard Black May 6, 2005

child support

The thing you have to sign up for nine months after you came early.

"I came early in my girlfriend today. Creampie!" -Rick

"Ask me how it feels in nine months when she's paying child support." -Wilson

"Nah, she's getting an abortion." -Rick

by Albert Freidstein IV January 10, 2016

Child Support

Something the government keeps forgeting to make unabusable.

Nolan: "I truly hate how easily child support can be abused. It's like legalized misandry. If you're a man, not losing your virginity still does not guarantee safety from this because paternity fraud exists. It is mind-blowing how the government is still ignoring this problem."

Leo: "Bullshit like this is why I'm not planning on getting any bitches, and why I'm avoiding areas where I'm likely to be forced to have sex with a woman."

by MyPseudonymThatsNotMyName September 7, 2022

child support

Something that bum ass nigga ain't NEVER finna pay

that BUM ASS NIGGA don't pay Child support.

by EATMYASS101 July 8, 2017

Child Support

The lesser of two evils, the other being actually raising your own kids.

Father: I told my wife she could either give me a blow job or get out. She took the kids and left. Later she realized what a mistake she'd made and returned the kids.

Father's friend: At least you don't have to pay child support.

by Mister Muckle March 6, 2011

child support

A mythological payment which is supposed to be paid to single mothers (now known as double mothers ) to alleviate the full financial burden of raising kids as well as looking after them. The UK's child support agency has spent billions of pounds of tax payers' money trying to prove the existance of this elusive payment, by asking the absent parent to supply it. However hardly any payments have been located by this multi-million pound organisation. This evidence suggests that child support is a mythological beast, concocted by a bored civil servant on a grey rainly English afternoon to tempt women into reckless procreation so that the media could have a bit of a laugh at their expense by painting them as morally inferior when they ended up poor and overworked.

single parent: Where the bee-jesus is my child support?
child support agency: cuckoo cuckoo cuckoo

by Vixen5 October 17, 2008