Jesus Christ 

Main character in the best selling fiction book of all time. Don't bother reading it though, he dies in the end.

I'm so bummed that Jesus Christ got killed off in the end of the Bible! But hey, they could totally make a killer zombie movie from his resurrection.

Jesus Christ by skifreemt February 25, 2010

Jesus freak 

someone evincing 2 or more of the following symptoms:
1: proclaims the lord is coming with the imminent end of the world
2: has signs on their person, car, or home with bible quotes
3: goes to church more than once a week
4: started their own christian offshoot cult because the rest aren;t pious enough
5: tries to foist an extreme form of christianity off on others
6: is a born-again christian and/or fundamentalist

every time i see that jesus freak walking around with his "god will save, the end is near" sign, i want to convert to satanism just so i can sacrifice him.

Jesus freak by minghi May 21, 2003

Jesus Phone

The iphone by apple. A phone that makes you feel like Jesus. In fact Jesus probably has one himself.

Rick: HOLY SHIT I GOT A JESUS PHONE!!!

Jesus Phone by Burkus December 19, 2008

jesus juice 

Yeah very funny. It's a terrible wine. They just call it that to make it sound glamorous or something. And the food stinks. Usually, this junk, you know? Even if you like to eat, you couldn’t eat it.

Yeah but sometimes, you see, it’s not that easy, you know what I mean? It's not all the cupcakes and Jesus juice like you might assume.

jesus juice by The Zug October 3, 2007

Jesus Chatline 

A religious chat line run by two pastors, Richard Burnish and Steven Chilton. It is commonly trolled by channel 4 users and people who have nothing else to do, like the reader who looked this definition up.

Bob: Hey, whats that religious streaming service called?

Mike: Oh, Jesus Chatline!

Jesus Chatline by Dank Tellituby May 13, 2017

Jesus loves you

Common word in beggers language.
Best used with phrase "God bleess you" with or without "...and have a nice day!"
JC!OMG!

"Spare a coin?"
-"Go away!"
"Jesus loves you!"

Jesus loves you by Helter Skelter January 5, 2005