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Monkey's

From monkey's arse. A more polite way of saying that you don't give a fuck/shit. Often used on television programmes shown before nine.
Hollie: Ruddy Hell! You're such a muppit.
Tom: I don't give a monkey's what you think.
by Lalalaura August 9, 2005
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Monkey Bitch

Jumps to every branch of a family tree. Basically wants those genes but needs somebody to fuck up.
Oh is it odd that me and all my cuzins fucked that monkey bitch?
by Teddy Bear Gangsta March 4, 2009
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monkey eating yogurt

a code word for an asshole.
person 1: did you see what that guy did to her?
person 2: yeah! he's a monkey eating yogurt!
by Creepy Carrie April 26, 2009
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monkey nyiguh

A phrase used while addressing a friend who shares the same interests in donkey kong and his awesomeness at strikers and all other video games which he is in.
Oh what's up my monkey nyiguh?

Look out it's the monkey nyiguh!
by Kaplar October 25, 2007
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Monkey Shudder

The feeling 'the morning after the night before'
That awful shudder that runs through your body when you remember something that you have said or done whilst intoxicated.
'Collossal Monkey Shudder'is the shudder that lasts more than 24 hours or prevents you from re-visiting the pub for atleast 2 weeks.
oh i have woken up 100 miles from home? how did iget here? *monkey shudder* oh shit i remember...
by sneezelouise March 11, 2009
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Monkey Truffle

After a night on the razz and acquiring a set of beer goggles, you pull a right munter and take her back to yours for a damn good seeing to.

Clothes come off and before you know it she's gobbling away. She asks for a bit of oral anal rimming, and due to wanting to get rid of the taste of the digusting Chicken Vindaloo you had on the way back, you agree.

On parting her arse crack you are greeted by an incredibly hairy arse crack (she is probably of Germanic origin) and she has a severe case of Piles and her hole has ballooned to look like a large truffle!
Christer bent the scank, which he pulled earlier that night, over the table to give her some rimming only to be greeted by a Monkey truffle.

Not wanting to ruin his chances of later action, he just pushed it all back inside and had a good slurp anyway.
by Waterboy8535 June 19, 2009
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Monkey Pumper

one who masturbates; one who jerks off; one who chokes one's chicken; one who strokes one's cork while massaging one's grapes
Employee1: Man, why is the boss such a jerk?!
Employee2: Ah, don't worry dude, he's just busin' your balls cause he's a monkey pumper.
by Drjerkle September 22, 2009
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