Carpenter

A person who is a problem solver for a high class crime family, usually fixing said problems with the problem disappearing without a trace.

The carpenter mad Johnny the rat disappear.

by Stacy the Face February 28, 2011

Carpeted the shed

To maintain and groom the female pubic hair (i.e. bush) to convey a pleasing appearance of the vagina (i.e. her shed).

Chris: Did you get any from Marie?
Kevin: Yea, we did oral and she really carpeted the shed!

by Britana6332 June 10, 2020

Carpenter

A carpenter is a legit, badass, problem solving, beer drinking, tang slaying, beast of a man!

Mary: man my dude is a pussy!
Mary’s friend: bitch you shoulda got you a carpenter! My man is the shit. Fixes everything and smashes like a beast!
Mary: well gotta Ditch this electrician!

by Bwahaha26 June 12, 2018

Rudy Carpenter

Worst collegiate quarterback of all time. Spent 4 years at ASU, turning a promising team with national title aspirations into a doormat that could not even beat the UA. Prone to blowing big games, throwing multiple interceptions, fumbling profusely, blaming others for his mistakes, and generally being a complete waste of a quarterback. Often found crying after a loss.

"Throw the ball Rudy, the receiver's open! Oh goddammit Rudy Carpenter why did you throw another interception?"

by eljefe81 June 21, 2009

Hollie Carpenter

Colloquial slang for a whore. Similar to a slag, but only greater on the prostitutional scale.

I Hollie Carpenter'd some girl last night!

Too bad she resembled a disfigured axe-wound.

by Mystery Tab December 10, 2009

Carpenterrhea

A psychological disorder in which a person believes they are a carpenter, however everything they build would be considered an abysmal failure by any respectable carpentry association.

Guy 1: That has to be the worst lamp stand I have ever seen.
Guy 2: NNNNnnnooooooooooooo!
......
Guy 1: Tell it to me straight, Doc, what's he got?
Doc: Carpenterrhea!

by Fls'Zen December 15, 2011

Carpenter

A chick who is an expert at nailing wood. In other words, a prostitute.

I was just looking for some local "carpenters" online.

by Wallydon February 1, 2010