turkish bullseye

A very large and overgrown patch of pubic hair, where the margin marking the transition from peri-vaginal hair to peri-anal hair is blurred-essentially creating a continuous patch of hair from the low back to the belly-button
Lee: Hey- Sanj- you hooked up with that hot chick priti - I bet that was incredible!

Sanj: Yeah, I thought it was going to be incredible- but she has a big turkish bullseye- it looked like a camel's asshole down there

Lee: Oh shit- that sucks
by schmuckaneers June 06, 2009
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obnoxious compulsive

When someone is completely unable to stop being a pain in the ass.
Ben: I am so sick of Tracy, its always something with her. "Did you get the report done yet? Does it always have to be so cold in here? I am having work issues with Margie that you need to fix."

Tom: I really hate obnoxious compulsive people too. We should move them all to an island somewhere.
by schmuckaneers September 26, 2009
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fauxtique

When something is cheaply constructed, made in china 3 months ago, but is "aged" to look like a real antique. These items are easy to purchase at pier one or other mid to lower end "import" stores.
Colin: Hey did you see Dave's new place? He just got a bunch of stuff from that mall store that sells cheap imports.

Paul: I don't see why that guy thinks buying all those fauxtiques is gonna make his place look good. He has brass plated elephants for crying out loud.

Colin: I know, its horrible. It looks like the best western "safari experience" theme hotel.
by schmuckaneers June 29, 2009
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hot-tistic

When someone completely loses all social interaction skills when around someone very hot. Similar to autistic, but only around attractive people.
Guy 1: Dude, what is up with you? You are such a social retard around hot chicks. I swear you are hot-tistic. I am not going to be your wingman ever again.

Guy 2: Sorry, I know, it sucks. They are just so hot all I can do is stare at their boobs and then I get caught looking and then I get embarrassed and then I can't be funny and then I start worrying and then it just gets worse from there.

Guy 1: Stop talking. I don't care.
by schmuckaneers October 12, 2009
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breads

When someone has dreads, but they are balding as well. This invariably leads to a poor cosmetic outcome, the wearer usually looks like a washed up hippie yoga instructor.
Andy: Did you see Mike? I haven't seen him in a while, his dreads have really started turning into breads. It looks horrid.

Pok: Ouch-at some point, you gotta let go of Jamacia, and say hello to middle age.
by schmuckaneers August 25, 2009
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sibcrepancy

When there is a very large discrepancy among siblings in hotness. Usually used when one sibling is very attractive, and the other one has been beaten severely with the ugly stick.
Minnix: God damn Alisha is so hot- I think she is the hottest bartender in the whole city.

Matt: Have you met her sister Jen?

Minnix: No- but I hope I do soon, thank god there are two of them...

Matt: Not so fast- there is some serious sibcrepancy there- Jen looks like someone punched her in the mouth with a fistfull of shit.

Minnix: Oh man, that's terrible-that means you aren't guaranteed to have a good looking kid with Alisha. Her stock just plummeted. How depressing.
by schmuckaneers May 13, 2009
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key west bullseye

Aka: Goatee; A pattern of facial hair on a homosexual male, forming a circular targetoid shape around the mouth. Origin in key west in the late 80's.
Mahal: Hey greg, you know sandy and her cousin kenny?

Greg: She has a lot of cousins- which one is he?

Mahal: He's that 40 year old dude with the old used corvette and a key west bullseye.

Greg: Oh yeah- that guy- I know exactly who you are talking about.
by schmuckaneers June 06, 2009
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