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hedley Clubnobber's definitions

EU

European Union; an organised hypocrisy of rapacious corporations, aristocrats and neo-catholics shepherding the mindless flock into Orwell's 1984. Modelled on plans set in place by one A. Hitler (popular Viennese painter and bon viveur; mid 20thC) then continued by every other Euro-demagogue since. Emblem on the EU Paliament, Goddess Europa riding a 10 headed beast. Nuff said! :(
EU taking you to Armageddon with style.
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
mugGet the EUmug.

idea

Something which, if considered good, cannot ever be used in a democratic society, the plural of which can only be prevented by joining any major political party. Something which a 'chav' never gets but a human may have when staring down to the bottom of an empty beer glass.
a. 'That's a good idea, Prime Minister'.

b. 'You swine!'.
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
mugGet the ideamug.

Oldham

Words will have to do....'Grim Up North' could've been written for this collection of stones. Nice on the outskirts but otherwise a sunami of chavness and thus a cultural wastland. It could indeed be the quintessential 'classless society' due to an extraordinary lack of style. Everything that socialism was meant to be! 'God-forsaken' would suggest the Almighty actually had been there once and so deliberately left it, which most authorities seriously doubt. A mix of Yorkshire rejects, Manchester overspill-uber-scum and the North Asian sub-continent. Market day reminding one strongly of the Orc army battle scenes in 'Lord of the Ringroads'.
Q. How do you know a girl from Oldham is having an orgasm?

A. She drops her chips.
by Hedley Clubnobber August 1, 2006
mugGet the Oldhammug.

newcastle emlyn

Small town/village in West Wales UK, that somehow, against all the odds, remains human, friendly and welcoming. You'll hear Welsh spoken just about everywhere by locals and not just by pretentious, crachach-welsh-wannabe-shit-heads from Cardiff. Some great pubs with great real ale, all in easy staggering distance of each other; so not just mass produced crap served to chavs, that drives you mental (which we hope they will continue serving to chavs, of course).
Sheep & cattle auction right next to the main street; how cool is that? Most locals have abandoned fashion in favour of having a life. Cool hippie shops and cafs galore.
Newcastle Emlyn; lets hope the English don't ruin it.

diolch o galon
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
mugGet the newcastle emlynmug.

barry

A town in South Wales. Scene of an awful genetic experiment in the late 20th C, that turned everyone into a chav. Barry leaves you feeling you've just spent an hour blowing up a balloon with a hole it.
The juvenile courts do a brisk trade.
Like most Welsh Towns the locals set the tone with a fair share of 'go-lightlies' on high-carb, high-fat, plenty-of-it diets. Oblivious as to how stupid they look, a pleasant Saturday can be spent watching local salad- dodgers grazing in the run-down shopping area. (However cannot rival Caerphilly as 'Fat Central'}
High Points:
Port Road; which largely avoids the place altogether.
Barry Island; which largely avoids culture altogether.
The local chemical works; main attraction.
The docks; which in the rain look like a lowry painting .
Er....that's it.
'Barry; A Great Place To Leave'
by Hedley Clubnobber August 1, 2006
mugGet the barrymug.

baghead

Term with which to affectionately chide one whose head, like a woman's handbag, contains everything and nothing all at the same time.
a. 'What are you up to now you baghead?'

b. 'I want a divorce'.
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
mugGet the bagheadmug.

care in the community

British poitical euphemism for 'piss off, we don't give a toss'. Usually applied to the disabled, elderly and infirm; a pre-requisite to depriving them of their savings and homes via low standard services. Normal to associate this with abandonment, loneliness and despair. The natural end to the industrial revolution.
Bank manager 1. 'Care in the community would be a good idea'.

Bank manager 2: 'Yes, we must tell the government to do it and sink those needy bastards'.
by Hedley Clubnobber August 27, 2006
mugGet the care in the communitymug.

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