daltonjfk's definitions
The first thing an alien buys after he drops his mixtape. Buckle is typically studded with space rocks.
“Zorg just released ‘Martian Sadboi’ and got straight into his rocket to go buy and Asteroid Gucci belt.”
by daltonjfk September 27, 2019
Get the Asteroid Gucci beltmug. Eating whatever scraps and leftovers one can find in the house after returning home from a night out. Jigsaw guzzlers are known to piece together meals of cold pasta in Tupperwares, hummus with a spoon, entire packets of sliced ham, and heels of bread from 4 different loaves.
Often leads to couch pizza the following day.
Often leads to couch pizza the following day.
Arriving home 3 hours before her 8AM sociology class, Kendra stumbled into the kitchen and jigsaw guzzled her roommates’ cereal, popcorn, and secret stash of Cheetos before devouring Sasha’s entire block of Parmesan.
by daltonjfk October 3, 2019
Get the Jigsaw guzzlemug. The fatty, tasty Seamless/Deliveroo meal you get for free, but only because you have to stay at the office past midnight and can expense it.
New analysts learn to salt their onion rings with their own tears and draw faces on their burger buns to pretend they still have friends. After several hours of weeping over ketchup and Excel spreadsheets, the eater of a burger & cries will often send a “u up” text to the delivery driver.
New analysts learn to salt their onion rings with their own tears and draw faces on their burger buns to pretend they still have friends. After several hours of weeping over ketchup and Excel spreadsheets, the eater of a burger & cries will often send a “u up” text to the delivery driver.
Those muffled sounds you hear of crackling pickles, crumpling paper bags, and deep, despairing sobs are the analysts in the back digging into their nightly Burger & Cries
by daltonjfk November 27, 2019
Get the Burger & Criesmug. His smug smile and white eyebrows give it all away - Mr. Clean's dirty secret arrives every Tuesday and Saturday and cleans his house with Shamwow.
by daltonjfk December 17, 2019
Get the Mr. Clean's Dirty Secretmug. The decision by numerous drunk and high party guests to sleep over at the hosts’ house without proper permission.
As in a hostile takeover, these party-shareholders acquire the target’s assets, such as sofa cushions and armchairs, and force the hosts to accept the merging of their bedrooms into communal cesspools.
The aftermath of a hostile sleepover may see animosity between the hosts and the guests, as well as the gutting of hosts’ refrigerators and towels as guests seek to serve short-term hunger and hygiene needs.
As in a hostile takeover, these party-shareholders acquire the target’s assets, such as sofa cushions and armchairs, and force the hosts to accept the merging of their bedrooms into communal cesspools.
The aftermath of a hostile sleepover may see animosity between the hosts and the guests, as well as the gutting of hosts’ refrigerators and towels as guests seek to serve short-term hunger and hygiene needs.
Mitchell and Andrew had a Halloween party, everyone brought a plus one, and by 2AM with six people passed out on the couch and on the floor, it was clear a hostile sleepover was about to take place.
by daltonjfk October 30, 2019
Get the Hostile sleepovermug. Liking one’s own instagram post from a secondary account. Dupes unsuspecting followers into believing the poster is one like more popular than they actually are.
by daltonjfk September 8, 2019
Get the Like launderingmug. A song so lit the masses submit to it unconditionally. Individuals of all music tastes have no choice but to adore its fat, wobbling rhythms. To criticise a Kim Jong Tune is a serious cultural heresy.
That fire drops like a nuclear bomb.
That fire drops like a nuclear bomb.
Back in the summer of 2015 I told people I didn’t like “Lean On”. The ensuing social ostracism I endured helped me understand that the song was in fact a Kim Jong Tune.
by daltonjfk September 23, 2019
Get the Kim Jong Tunemug.