His smug smile and white eyebrows give it all away - Mr. Clean's dirty secret arrives every Tuesday and Saturday and cleans his house with Shamwow.
by daltonjfk December 17, 2019
Get the Mr. Clean's Dirty Secretmug. Dime baggies of drugs your friends have had stashed away in their bottom drawer since March 2020. You can tell from the anemic plastic and dustbuster-looking powder inside that these particular drugs have not seen the sweet inside of a dollar bill since before every bar stopped accepting cash.
You may have survived a pandemic, but with these uncertain dimes back in circulation, your Friday night at Kind Regards might be more dangerous than ever before.
by daltonjfk September 24, 2021
Get the These Uncertain Dimesmug. The one person in the group who puts in the effort to organise shit, text people individually, and round up the troops.
Quarterback contacts can be found orchestrating elaborate plays on WhatsApp and iMessage groups to trick the whole squad into getting together.
Every group needs one.
Quarterback contacts can be found orchestrating elaborate plays on WhatsApp and iMessage groups to trick the whole squad into getting together.
Every group needs one.
William knows exactly who to say is coming to each person in the group to get them to show up. He’s the admin of 4 group chats and is always on his phone. He is his group’s Quarterback Contact.
by daltonjfk September 23, 2019
Get the Quarterback contactmug. Rogue slices of pizza discovered in the cracks of a couch after a long night of drinking and/or smoking the devil’s cabbage.
Often consumed, though always in secret.
Often consumed, though always in secret.
by daltonjfk September 16, 2019
Get the Couch pizzamug. A late-night Uber Pool packed full of passed-out passengers.
Urban mythology has long recounted tales of supposed hookups enjoyed by friends of friends in the backseat of Honda Insights heading from the cluburbs to the suburbs in the early morning hours, though in reality these vehicles are filled only with the smell of tequila and sound of snoring.
Urban mythology has long recounted tales of supposed hookups enjoyed by friends of friends in the backseat of Honda Insights heading from the cluburbs to the suburbs in the early morning hours, though in reality these vehicles are filled only with the smell of tequila and sound of snoring.
1: “You drank 12 Monacos last night before you disappeared - how did you even get home?”
2. “Called a Slumber Pool and asked the driver to marry me when we got back Uptown.”
2. “Called a Slumber Pool and asked the driver to marry me when we got back Uptown.”
by daltonjfk October 30, 2019
Get the Slumber poolmug. by daltonjfk September 16, 2019
Get the Snoop Foggmug. A tactical vomit effected in order to continue a night out.
The seventh-inning wretch normally occurs between 11pm and 1am, when partygoers who mixed whiskey and beer or rum and wine at the pregame dash to the restroom to pitch forward and re-serve their dinner plate. The seventh-inning wretch is normally a solitary event but can also be a team effort.
The seventh-inning wretch normally occurs between 11pm and 1am, when partygoers who mixed whiskey and beer or rum and wine at the pregame dash to the restroom to pitch forward and re-serve their dinner plate. The seventh-inning wretch is normally a solitary event but can also be a team effort.
When everyone decided spontaneously to go to a club after Neil’s pregame and the bar next door, I dashed to the facilities for a seventh-inning wretch so the bouncers wouldn’t see how plastered I was.
by daltonjfk November 04, 2019
Get the Seventh-inning wretchmug.