1. "Why did you screenshot all those DMs you got from Lucia's ex? You trying to start beef?"
2. "Nah, I actually slid into his DMs ages ago after she dipped from the club without paying. The DMs and screenshots are part of the raise cattle phase."
2. "Nah, I actually slid into his DMs ages ago after she dipped from the club without paying. The DMs and screenshots are part of the raise cattle phase."
by daltonjfk December 17, 2019

What your roommate watches after quietly walking to his bedroom and locking the door. Was formerly known as pornography.
Jarod: “Mike’s been in his room a while. What do you think is going on?”
Kevin: “He’s definitely watching some nog.”
Kevin: “He’s definitely watching some nog.”
by daltonjfk August 30, 2019

Private parts belonging to your friend who will hook up with anyone.
Like public parks, but remain open at night time.
Like public parks, but remain open at night time.
Grace: "Girls, I must admit that after the Kappa party I may have stayed over in Thad's room."
Brianna: "You got up on that manslut's public parts??"
Brianna: "You got up on that manslut's public parts??"
by daltonjfk December 19, 2019

an individual of such immeasurable stature that he may be mistaken for a terrestrial rock formation. Attracts enthusiasts but should be attempted only by trained professionals.
Liam: “Whoa dude, there’s a pair of legs over there at the bar all by themselves!”
Wolfrick: “Nah bro, lean your head back and you’ll see it’s really a Count Everest”
Wolfrick: “Nah bro, lean your head back and you’ll see it’s really a Count Everest”
by daltonjfk August 30, 2019

Expression pronounced by someone who has just heard a joke or story of such high comic value that the listener is instantly deceased. The listener may request an urn from their friends in which to store their remains safely for posterity.
Those who prefer enterrement to cremation may alternatively request “coffin pls”.
Those who prefer enterrement to cremation may alternatively request “coffin pls”.
1: “Did you hear about Gary swimming naked in his boss’s koi pond while stoned.”
2: “Fetch me an urn please.”
2: “Fetch me an urn please.”
by daltonjfk September 30, 2019

Swiping psychotically through Tinder after dinner each night of the holidays to kill time and ensure matches.
Alone in quarantine or bored stiff on their parents' couch, young singles everywhere swipe to the end of their daily allowance, reaping a heinous daily match with a past-prime hometown hottie, or the waiter from the cafe downstairs you've never seen with his mask off. Tinder Advent Calendar matches offer all the short-lived indulgence of the advent chocolates of childhood, but with the added risk of a dick pic.
Alone in quarantine or bored stiff on their parents' couch, young singles everywhere swipe to the end of their daily allowance, reaping a heinous daily match with a past-prime hometown hottie, or the waiter from the cafe downstairs you've never seen with his mask off. Tinder Advent Calendar matches offer all the short-lived indulgence of the advent chocolates of childhood, but with the added risk of a dick pic.
Harriet's Tinder Advent Calendar currently features Abs Joe from Chem, now a year-round receptionist, and Cute Window Guy who makes ugly infographics on his Instagram.
by daltonjfk December 17, 2020

Similar to friends with benefits, a hookup that occurs routinely between two people who have no particular feelings for each other but find it convenient to hook up when they end up at the same bar or party.
Automatically connects, even when you don’t want it to.
Automatically connects, even when you don’t want it to.
Drunk and bored at the same party for the third time this month, Julia and Gareth resumed their Bluetooth hookup on Friday.
by daltonjfk September 23, 2019
