daltonjfk's definitions
Private parts belonging to your friend who will hook up with anyone.
Like public parks, but remain open at night time.
Like public parks, but remain open at night time.
Grace: "Girls, I must admit that after the Kappa party I may have stayed over in Thad's room."
Brianna: "You got up on that manslut's public parts??"
Brianna: "You got up on that manslut's public parts??"
by daltonjfk December 19, 2019
Get the Public parts mug.The friend or flatmate whose glistening fingers are always in your food.
Mr. Steal Yo Meal keeps very little in his own refrigerator. Eyewitness reports typically mention fuzzy half-eaten salads from Sweetgreen, cold lasagna, and the last slice in the packet of cold cuts. Though he is never seen preparing his own food, Mr. Steal Yo Meal is never hungry because in under a second, his arachnid-like digits can pilfer half a portion of fries and a pan full of pasta you were going to eat later.
Mr. Steal Yo Meal keeps very little in his own refrigerator. Eyewitness reports typically mention fuzzy half-eaten salads from Sweetgreen, cold lasagna, and the last slice in the packet of cold cuts. Though he is never seen preparing his own food, Mr. Steal Yo Meal is never hungry because in under a second, his arachnid-like digits can pilfer half a portion of fries and a pan full of pasta you were going to eat later.
1. "Your Honor, the defendant was caught smacking his lips despite having not cooked any dinner for himself. The defense rests."
2. "The Judge finds Mr. Steal Yo Meal guilty of Grand Theft Nuggets and sentences him to a trip to the grocery store on his own damn card."
2. "The Judge finds Mr. Steal Yo Meal guilty of Grand Theft Nuggets and sentences him to a trip to the grocery store on his own damn card."
by daltonjfk November 6, 2019
Get the Mr. Steal Yo Meal mug.by daltonjfk August 30, 2019
Get the No print no scan mug.The first thing an alien buys after he drops his mixtape. Buckle is typically studded with space rocks.
“Zorg just released ‘Martian Sadboi’ and got straight into his rocket to go buy and Asteroid Gucci belt.”
by daltonjfk September 27, 2019
Get the Asteroid Gucci belt mug.Hot, charismatic guy whom you quickly realise is some seriously toxic bad news.
Irresistable with his deep voice, toned chest, and prickly stubble; owns a different quilted coat for every outfit and actually knows how to fold a pocket square. However, after not much time you realise he has more insecurities than a game of Jenga and more commitment issues than the New York Subway.
Irresistable with his deep voice, toned chest, and prickly stubble; owns a different quilted coat for every outfit and actually knows how to fold a pocket square. However, after not much time you realise he has more insecurities than a game of Jenga and more commitment issues than the New York Subway.
Yvonne: "I don't know...he's in the best frat, drives a Benz, looks like Apollo, has a house in Rapallo..."
Ciara: "Leave him. He may have the biceps of Zeus, but he's still just a douche. His smile's disarming, but he's still Prince Alarming..."
Ciara: "Leave him. He may have the biceps of Zeus, but he's still just a douche. His smile's disarming, but he's still Prince Alarming..."
by daltonjfk October 3, 2019
Get the Prince Alarming mug.The circular imprint that develops in the skin of a wallet when a single man has carried an as-yet unused condom in it for too long.
Even after removing the contraceptive wang-sleeve (usually due to expiration rather than use), the single man's ring will usually persist for months to come. Upon close inspection, the single man's ring may occasionally be found pressed into banknotes and jeans pockets.
Even after removing the contraceptive wang-sleeve (usually due to expiration rather than use), the single man's ring will usually persist for months to come. Upon close inspection, the single man's ring may occasionally be found pressed into banknotes and jeans pockets.
Wandering the bars on Wednesday night, Pete realised the single man's ring which had developed in his wallet announced to all bartenders that he was wedded to the sadboi life.
by daltonjfk October 26, 2019
Get the Single man's ring mug.His smug smile and white eyebrows give it all away - Mr. Clean's dirty secret arrives every Tuesday and Saturday and cleans his house with Shamwow.
by daltonjfk December 17, 2019
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