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daltonjfk's definitions

George W. F. H. Bush

Commando-in-sheets. President of working from home in nothing but a shirt. Gets dressed by invading the Dryrack. Went to Yale but pretends to be from Texas to gain acceptance from his O&G colleagues. Bedroom also known as the Broval Office.
Colleagues on Teams call: "I think you're on mute - we can't hear you."
George W. F. H. Bush: "But I can hear YOU!"
by daltonjfk September 24, 2021
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These Uncertain Dimes

Dime baggies of drugs your friends have had stashed away in their bottom drawer since March 2020. You can tell from the anemic plastic and dustbuster-looking powder inside that these particular drugs have not seen the sweet inside of a dollar bill since before every bar stopped accepting cash.
You may have survived a pandemic, but with these uncertain dimes back in circulation, your Friday night at Kind Regards might be more dangerous than ever before.
by daltonjfk September 24, 2021
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George W. F. H. Bush

The commando-in-chief. President of working from home in nothing but a shirt, gets dressed by invading the Dryrack. Went to Yale but says he's from Texas so his O&G coworkers will accept him.
Coworkers on the Teams call: "I think you're on mute, we can't hear you."
George W. F. H. Bush: "But I can hear you!"
by daltonjfk September 24, 2021
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Tinder Advent Calendar

Swiping psychotically through Tinder after dinner each night of the holidays to kill time and ensure matches.

Alone in quarantine or bored stiff on their parents' couch, young singles everywhere swipe to the end of their daily allowance, reaping a heinous daily match with a past-prime hometown hottie, or the waiter from the cafe downstairs you've never seen with his mask off. Tinder Advent Calendar matches offer all the short-lived indulgence of the advent chocolates of childhood, but with the added risk of a dick pic.
Harriet's Tinder Advent Calendar currently features Abs Joe from Chem, now a year-round receptionist, and Cute Window Guy who makes ugly infographics on his Instagram.
by daltonjfk December 17, 2020
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Sky high January

What everyone doing Dry January has secretly started by the middle of the month.

They may not be washing back Buds with Whiskey suds, but don’t be fooled. They’re high as balls.
Ah yes, Leonard and Celine back at their old charade - pushing the wine glasses away as if we didn’t know they’re in full-blown Sky High January mode and smoked three blunts before they came to dinner.
by daltonjfk January 17, 2020
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Flexico

The corner of Instagram densely populated by basic rich kids' spring break photos.
In the #unfiltered alleyways of Flexico, you will behold Sara's ivory beach kimono with the little green birds embroidered on it; on the vsco boulevards of the Flexican peninsula you will find Robbie and Mikey posing on the bow of their father's Sunseaker...all this you will find in Flexico, and all this you will forward to your groupchat to bitch about.
by daltonjfk December 20, 2019
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Tide Shrine

The statue of dirty clothes that develops on the chair or floor in a bedroom.

Stained by red wine and the sands of time. Thought by experts to be a sacrifice to Tide Pods.
When entering Victor's room, please be sure to step around the six-foot Tide Shrine making its way from his closet to his chaise longue.
by daltonjfk December 19, 2019
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