The friend or flatmate whose glistening fingers are always in your food.
Mr. Steal Yo Meal keeps very little in his own refrigerator. Eyewitness reports typically mention fuzzy half-eaten salads from Sweetgreen, cold lasagna, and the last slice in the packet of cold cuts. Though he is never seen preparing his own food, Mr. Steal Yo Meal is never hungry because in under a second, his arachnid-like digits can pilfer half a portion of fries and a pan full of pasta you were going to eat later.
Mr. Steal Yo Meal keeps very little in his own refrigerator. Eyewitness reports typically mention fuzzy half-eaten salads from Sweetgreen, cold lasagna, and the last slice in the packet of cold cuts. Though he is never seen preparing his own food, Mr. Steal Yo Meal is never hungry because in under a second, his arachnid-like digits can pilfer half a portion of fries and a pan full of pasta you were going to eat later.
1. "Your Honor, the defendant was caught smacking his lips despite having not cooked any dinner for himself. The defense rests."
2. "The Judge finds Mr. Steal Yo Meal guilty of Grand Theft Nuggets and sentences him to a trip to the grocery store on his own damn card."
2. "The Judge finds Mr. Steal Yo Meal guilty of Grand Theft Nuggets and sentences him to a trip to the grocery store on his own damn card."
by daltonjfk November 06, 2019
A sad vacation to a sad location. The Ghettaway is the family getaway to Fort Lauderdale, the weddings in Palm Springs, the company retreats to Myrtle Beach, the honeymoon at the Hilton Honolulu. While most often accessed by car or RV, Ghettaway hotspots can also be reached via Spirit Airlines or Greyhound bus.
Common Ghettaway activities include threatening a divorce, sleeping with unattractive coworkers, wearing Oakley sunglasses, and yelling inappropriately at one's children in the line for cracked waterslides. Returning home with gift-shop T-shirts is typically considered a must.
Common Ghettaway activities include threatening a divorce, sleeping with unattractive coworkers, wearing Oakley sunglasses, and yelling inappropriately at one's children in the line for cracked waterslides. Returning home with gift-shop T-shirts is typically considered a must.
The whole block knew it was time for the Bransons' annual Ghettaway to Virginia Beach when they could be seen packing their motor home with enough Mountain Dew for the two weeks of Spring Break.
by daltonjfk October 18, 2019
Rogue slices of pizza discovered in the cracks of a couch after a long night of drinking and/or smoking the devil’s cabbage.
Often consumed, though always in secret.
Often consumed, though always in secret.
by daltonjfk September 16, 2019
Award given to a college student kitchen that has produced dishes other than pasta, couscous, and scrambled eggs. Prize includes a set of forks that match each other.
Gaia: “I went over to Brooke’s last night and she made baked potatoes with mushrooms.”
Sammy: “Someone give that girl a College Michelin Star.”
Sammy: “Someone give that girl a College Michelin Star.”
by daltonjfk September 27, 2019
Someone you wouldn't really talk to except that sitting next to them in class comes with the crucial benefit of always being able to borrow their pens.
Fuccbois and fuccgirls worldwide begin making friends with penefits around middle school, and perfect the technique in high school and college. Shy students with large, adorned pencil cases are often the targets.
Always a one-sided relationship. Taker will gnaw on pen caps the way lovers gnaw on hearts.
Fuccbois and fuccgirls worldwide begin making friends with penefits around middle school, and perfect the technique in high school and college. Shy students with large, adorned pencil cases are often the targets.
Always a one-sided relationship. Taker will gnaw on pen caps the way lovers gnaw on hearts.
From 7th grade through 11th grade, Teddy thought Alyssa and him might have a future together after sitting together in English for 6 years. However, when he started using a tablet and stylus instead of his Pilot pens, she moved to sit next to Chad and he realised they had never been anything more than friends with penefits.
by daltonjfk October 03, 2019
Mountain Dew, Monster, or any other high-sugar caffeinated soft drink to which white males aged 15-35 become addicted while listening intently and crying softly to the songs of Nickelback and Linkin Park.
Popular in suburban America but can be found elsewhere.
Popular in suburban America but can be found elsewhere.
Trevor: “Yo Kyle’s put on a lot of weight since the summer started.”
Mikey: “Yeah bro, his girlfriend dumped him so he’s been playing cod and hitting that Nickelback crack.”
Mikey: “Yeah bro, his girlfriend dumped him so he’s been playing cod and hitting that Nickelback crack.”
by daltonjfk September 01, 2019
by daltonjfk September 16, 2019