Practically unacknowledged existence of highly porky smelling oil secreted around the anus - avoid showering for a few days to discover this. Can be smeared under the nose of a fellow camping / dormitory occupant as a punishment.
Other 'oils' exist - discover and enjoy......
Lamb oil - found in the pubes,
Cheese oil - found between toes esp. athletes foot
Bacon & onion oil - armpits
Chicken oil - hair!
Prawn oil - earns, esp if infected.
Other 'oils' exist - discover and enjoy......
Lamb oil - found in the pubes,
Cheese oil - found between toes esp. athletes foot
Bacon & onion oil - armpits
Chicken oil - hair!
Prawn oil - earns, esp if infected.
by Brucester September 10, 2006
Draconian punishment for the fussy girfriend who keeps complaining about your unavoidabe flatulence, and who keeps escaping when you try to hold her head under the blanket.
A rich fart is released silently into your hand, you expell all air from your lungs then breath in the fart from your closed hand. You now make an amorous approach and breath the fart into her face / mouth as you kiss her. This will cure the problem as she WILL leave you. Failing this you repeat the procedure but first you bite strips of of your fingernails and wedge them between your teeth - an "indirect fart with nails"
A rich fart is released silently into your hand, you expell all air from your lungs then breath in the fart from your closed hand. You now make an amorous approach and breath the fart into her face / mouth as you kiss her. This will cure the problem as she WILL leave you. Failing this you repeat the procedure but first you bite strips of of your fingernails and wedge them between your teeth - an "indirect fart with nails"
I gave her an indirect fart
by Brucester September 10, 2006
Troglodytes, cave dwellers. Caver, potholer, spelaeologist,
spelunker. A highly respectable name for anyone physically tough enough and experienced in exploring caves or potholes.
Someone of immense stamina - probably under 30 years of age.
spelunker. A highly respectable name for anyone physically tough enough and experienced in exploring caves or potholes.
Someone of immense stamina - probably under 30 years of age.
by Brucester September 10, 2006
"How can I put the sensitively Gemma, our friend Gideon, the one you made a move on this morning, well he, em, is a Brown Trout Fisherman" "Oh dear I'm not putting this very well am I....he's a sausage jockey, a marmite driller, a pillow biter"
2 hours later....
".....A Hershey highwayman, a fudge packer"
"OH, you mean he's GAY"
"Yes"
2 hours later....
".....A Hershey highwayman, a fudge packer"
"OH, you mean he's GAY"
"Yes"
by Brucester September 16, 2006
by Brucester September 10, 2006
Used disposable nappy. Once folded into place with the velcrow wings secured it resembles a product from the Ginsters range.
by Brucester September 10, 2006
'Pseudo Good' is an event that you feel good or happy about but only because it has deceived you into thinking it is good. The good was only a possibility - but it turned out to be nothing.
Pseudo Good is the opium of life, it keeps you positive, it usually does not amount to 'actual good' but by then you have forgotten how lame the Pseudo Good was and you happliy swallow the next load of Pseudo Good, just like a gold fish biting at nothing because its memory is too short to remember that nothing doesn't taste of anything.
Pseudo Good is the opium of life, it keeps you positive, it usually does not amount to 'actual good' but by then you have forgotten how lame the Pseudo Good was and you happliy swallow the next load of Pseudo Good, just like a gold fish biting at nothing because its memory is too short to remember that nothing doesn't taste of anything.
I'm so happy that x girl at college is starting to be friendly with me! - Six weeks later she blanks me because she only wanted to get a lift with me to classes. It was only Pseudo Good.
I'm so happy - the boss wants a meeting with me next week about the managers job - Turns out he just wanted me to cover the vacancy until someone more experienced replys to the job add. It was only Pseudo Good.
I'm so happy x company wants to buy our stuff, all my hard sales work has paid off!! - turns out that their previous supplier had put them on stop due to non payment because they have no money and now they are going bust owing us thousnads and we are probably going to go bust too. It was only Pseudo Good.
I'm so happy - I've just voted for a new government - (Insert outcome here)
I'm so happy - the boss wants a meeting with me next week about the managers job - Turns out he just wanted me to cover the vacancy until someone more experienced replys to the job add. It was only Pseudo Good.
I'm so happy x company wants to buy our stuff, all my hard sales work has paid off!! - turns out that their previous supplier had put them on stop due to non payment because they have no money and now they are going bust owing us thousnads and we are probably going to go bust too. It was only Pseudo Good.
I'm so happy - I've just voted for a new government - (Insert outcome here)
by Brucester May 11, 2011