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Brucester's definitions

tarahted

Impressively knackered or broken.
1. I'll give it a miss, I'm feeling totally tarahted

2. Well I might as well bin it now, you've completely tarahted it.

3. Have you seen what those chavs have done to the bus stop - it's completely tarahted.
by Brucester September 10, 2006
mugGet the tarahtedmug.

Brexititis

A neurological condition whereby the patient's real personality is suddenly revealed by their simple loss of ability to accept views different to their own, Leave or Remain, to the point at which they suspend all respect for others and then enter into raised levels of judgement and hatred creating social division.

Signs include excess heat, hot sunken eyes, redness, finger poking, increased volume, pronounced veins, general appearance of shitty indignation and judgemental and personal posting on social media including memes that are borderline legal.

Brexititis can be highly contagious in closed circles such as pubs, market stalls, farms, small businesses, school staff rooms and hospitals and is more prevalent among people aged 30+. Bed rest is the only cure - hence young people tend never to catch it in the first place.
They were having a stimulating conversation and then someone said, "What do you reckon to the referendum?". Immigration was then discussed whereupon several people exhibited an episode of Brexititis.
by Brucester July 2, 2016
mugGet the Brexititismug.

Gronk

British Trainspotter speak for a class 08
diesel electric shunting loco. The BTC commissioned about 1100 of them back in the late 50s and a substantial number are still in traffic.

Gronks are sometimes known as Jockos
1V57 failed just outside Reading and they had to use a Gronk to haul it in out of the way.
by Brucester February 24, 2009
mugGet the Gronkmug.

spam flautist

Presidential spam flautist Monika Lewinski lied in court again today, yet privately hoped she would be found out, as the whole point of the exercise was that she wanted to simply be catalogued in history as someone who blew the President. <Mindless cunt>
by Brucester September 13, 2006
mugGet the spam flautistmug.

braggington

A health professional who doesn't like NHS patients and treats them like second class citizens, then braggs about it to their staff.
"Aren't you going for a check up today?" "Nope I've suffered a right braggington, - I was struck off for answering back!"
by Brucester October 10, 2006
mugGet the braggingtonmug.

builder's inspection

Unprofessional behaviour by domestic builders whereby during their lunch break they ALWAYS inspect the contents of the underwear drawer of an absent home owner especially if she is a real honey. Passing the items round they mentally picture her wearing them....I'm told...by numerous building acquaintances.
"Arrrrrrrrgh !!! You make sure you lock those fucking monkies out when you leave tomorrow"

"Why ????? They're doing great with the conservatory"

"BECAUSE David, they've held a fucking Builder's Inspection - that's why....I can tell"
by Brucester September 18, 2006
mugGet the builder's inspectionmug.

Spidge

"Treasure" brought up from shipwrecks on the seabed by scuba divers.

For "Treasure" read - mainly bits of brass rubbish. For "Brought up" read - furiuosly chiseled off against the clock. For "Scuba Divers" read - thieving pikeys.
For "Seabed" read - murkey depths of cold water with visibility of two metres.

For Spidge there is a heirachy of value, disregard all gold, jewells and other fantasy land nonsense the real wreck treasure chart goes something like this:-

1= Ships bell
2= Telegraph / telemotor
3= Compass binnacle
4= Helm
5= Steam whistle
6= Nice brass Nav or deck lights
7= Portholes
8= Crockery & cutlery etc

Consolation prizes for the lower ranks of the air diving one tank numpty:-

Rubber soles from dead seamans shoes, unidentified piece of brass, crockery fragment, lead shot, hooked up fishing weights, pieces of diving equipment dropped by other novices.

All of the quality items have to be reported to the Receiver Of Wreck who finds out if you are allowed to keep the stuff. The remaining detritus is used to decorate your fireplace until you get married when the wife "accidentally" puts it out for the dustman.
"Dived the Lanfrac last weekend"
"Hur hur, find any gold"
"Er, yes actually! a solid bar of it, unfortunately it was a Leigh Bishop trip so in fact it had been placed there and was lead cast and sprayed gold to look like one"
"Hur hur - Fools Spidge!"
by Brucester July 29, 2007
mugGet the Spidgemug.

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