mastodonic

Adjective used to describe a huge, gigantic penis. Named after the mastodons, an extint species of elephants.

Synonym: elephant cock

I'm going to rape you with my mastodonic 300-mile long cock.

by Roth Vantage January 05, 2015

Johnny Carson

Whiskey with an Alka-Seltzer in it.

I woke up hungover as hell and made myself a Johnny Carson.

by Roth Vantage October 21, 2017

post-toilet shit disorder

1. Parody of PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder)
2. Repeated incidents of having to shit more right after leaving the bathroom after a bathroom episode is thought to be finished. See also: second-wave shit

Why's Jimmy always take half an hour to take a shit? He's always late for the football game.
I don't know, I think he's got post-toilet shit disorder

by Roth Vantage November 19, 2014

Hairy Potter

The act of sticking a broomstick up your ass and then running around with it while holding your erect cock with both of your hands.

For extra points, urinate profusely while doing it.

Look, Larry's doing a Hairy Potter again!

by Roth Vantage September 23, 2015

the movies

Movie theater/cinema

Where do you take a cake? To the movies?

by Roth Vantage January 20, 2017

jack pleasure

Masturbation

-...Jack pleasure?

-Y'know, fappin' on the toilet, roughing up the subject, beating up the bishop, taking matters into your own hand...

by Roth Vantage August 20, 2016

the bottle

A blanket term for or embodiment of alcohol abuse, as in 'the dreaded bottle'. When a person 'turns to the bottle', the person will abuse alcohol to forget his or her problems.

The bottle is my only friend.

by Roth Vantage December 26, 2014