QuacksO's definitions

youtilize

What a lazy-a** malingerer does --- i.e., availing himself of the brains/muscles of anyone nearby to do jobs ("Would YOU do this? Would YOU do that?") for him --- instead of getting up odd his ample butt and tackling said tasks himself.

Biff Tannen was notorious for his conscience-deprived lack of effort and ambition; ever since they were in school together, Biff would youtilize the nerdy wimpy-natured George McFly's superior book-knowledge and intellectual patience/perseverance by bullying him into completing Biff's paperwork-assignments for him.

by QuacksO August 1, 2019

pre-shower project-ponder

Refers to da interval of careful consideration dat you invest prior to jumpin' into da tub --- to save time, water, and electricity, you simply pause a moment first and ask yourself if their are any hot/messy tasks dat you will soon need to complete, and then see if you can reasonably tackle said disagreeable jobs while you're all "gross 'n' greasy" anyway, so dat you can then just partake of one good hot sudsy scrub-a-dub instead of having to tediously/wastefully endure two baths within a fairly short period.

After a long hot day of collecting returnables, I performed a brief pre-shower project-ponder and realized I needed to take out the garbage, so I performed that yucky task while my water-heater was warming up.

by QuacksO August 1, 2019

horizontal handshake

A.k.a. "moocher's greeting" or "glad-handout"; it refers to where one of your "friends" beamingly approaches you with extended arm as if to greet you with a hearty palm-clasp, but instead of positioning his hand vertically the way one usually does when shaking hands, he holds his outstretched palm **upwards** so that his hand is horizontal --- this "gimme, gimme, gimme" position is how his hand is usually held whenever he is around fellow humans (duh!).

I always feel suspicious whenever someone greets me with a horizontal handshake, since it is a good indication that he is planning to ask me for a handout.

by QuacksO August 2, 2019

Exxoff

Refers to where you opt out (as in, marking an "X" to "sign off") of purchasing anything from Standard Oil Company.

Thousands of people did a total Exxoff after the Valdez tanker-accident in Alaska in 1989.

by QuacksO August 2, 2019

glad-handout

Where someone eagerly/effusively greets you in a super-jovial "hearty handshake" manner merely to hopefully put you more in the mood to give him a loan or ride or other gratuity that he doesn't deserve and probably will not be able/willing to pay you back for.

In one of the classic Burns & Allen shows, Gracie laughingly reads over some old love-letters from George, which are in poetry-form and are invariably glad-handouts, as in, "I love you lots, I love you plenty; I love you true, send me twenty!"

by QuacksO August 2, 2019

pollio

An illness that inhibits your ability to vote effectively.

As big a jacka** as many politicians make themselves look like when running for office, they must figure that most of us are afflicted with pollio if they think we have such poor judgement that we can't see though all their bull-crap!

by QuacksO August 2, 2019

axecessory

A supplementary tool that lumberjacks use, such as a peavey or hand-saw.

Paul Bunyan enjoyed using all of his various wood-handling tools to supplement his huge "chopper-sledge", but Babe the Blue Ox was actually alive and thus provided him with companionship during his long boring days in the forest, and so she was his favorite axecessory.

by QuacksO August 3, 2019