Definitions by QuacksO
Blowjob Roberts
The infamous late-80's televangelist who scammed money out of people by telling them that The Great One was gonna "smite him" if he didn't receive a certain number of "oral sessions" from his viewers.
As much debauchery and graphic sexual language is freely bandied about in the Bible, it's no wonder that there are now so many "Blowjob Roberts" characters around --- dudes who solicit sexual acts/relations from ordinarily-celibate/unwilling gals (think Warren Jeffs) by packaging their requests as "fulfillment of religious obligations"... yuck!!!
Blowjob Roberts by QuacksO July 22, 2018
Murphy's Pedestrian-Perks Law
Refers to the infuriatingly-common "lousy timing" occurrence of your seldom encountering the usually-hoped-for opportunities/pleasantries (i.e., neighbors relaxing on their front porches/lawns whom you can shoot the breeze with on your way by, pretty girls to hold hands with and "chat up for a few", sizable numbers of discarded returnable containers, etc.) whenever you're out for a stroll or otherwise leisurely traipsing around your local area on foot, yet when you either hitch a ride with someone or are "a man on a mission" in your own vehicle and thus you can't "acceptably" stop to avail yourself of any of these assorted "sidewalk delights", the roadsides you travel along will either be "chock-full of friendlies" or "Bottle/Can City", and so you'll be mentally "climbin' da walls" at having to agonizingly pass on by all of those much-desired goodies.
It was foggy and chilly when I started out walking around town to complete my weekly errands-list, and so there was hardly another soul outdoors, but then sometime later when I was riding back again with a neighbor who'd offered me a lift home, the weather turned clear and balmy again, and there were lots of smiley-faced sundress-clad cuties strolling the walks all over town! Guess it was Murphy's Pedestrian-Perks Law at work!
Murphy's Pedestrian-Perks Law by QuacksO July 21, 2018
A**h*leperger's Syndrome
A supposed serious mental condition which jerks/bullies use as an excuse to be total a**h**es to everyone around them.
Tronald Dump is always making lame excuses for his deplorable behavior; he claims it's Asperger's Syndrome, but I'd say that it sounds more like classic A**h*leperger's Syndrome to me. Move over, Ethan Couch.
A**h*leperger's Syndrome by QuacksO July 21, 2018
shnugglez or shnooglez?
A cuddly-affectionate "sweet nothings" choice of two very-similar closely-clasping gestures that are playfully offered by one lover to his hunnybunny; about the only difference between the two lovey-dovey actions is that "shnooglez" involves somewhat more "up close 'n' personal" burrowing action with one's head and face during the snuggle-session.
Huge marshmallow-hearted guy: Ya want SHNUGGLEZ or SHNOOGLEZ???
Cutie: Ummmmm --- surprise me!
Huge marshmallow-hearted guy: Okay --- maybe I'll just give ya a bit of both, then... kinda like mixing apple and orange juices together when ya aren't sure which one ya want.
Cutie, gigglingly nestling back into Mr. Softhearted's adoringly-encircling embrace: Okay, if you say so. It kinda just all feels like about da same nice warm gentle nuzzley cuddle-hugz, but ALL of your clasps 'n' caresses are equally heavenly and satisfying, so it doesn't really matter to me what ya call 'em.
Cutie: Ummmmm --- surprise me!
Huge marshmallow-hearted guy: Okay --- maybe I'll just give ya a bit of both, then... kinda like mixing apple and orange juices together when ya aren't sure which one ya want.
Cutie, gigglingly nestling back into Mr. Softhearted's adoringly-encircling embrace: Okay, if you say so. It kinda just all feels like about da same nice warm gentle nuzzley cuddle-hugz, but ALL of your clasps 'n' caresses are equally heavenly and satisfying, so it doesn't really matter to me what ya call 'em.
shnugglez or shnooglez? by QuacksO July 21, 2018
grunch
Not to be confused with the cantankerous hairy green sneaky-smile dude who hates Chris --- oops, I should say, da "winter holidays" --- this terms refers to the grating nerve-jarring noise made by a crabbily-dissatisfied person while chewing a less-than-pleasant-textured food in lieu of some more-palatable snack. The disgruntled person shovels in a big mouthful of said hard/lumpy comestible, presses his cheek firmly against the ear of whoever served him said "delightful delicacy" and then begins chomping slowly and irritably (making "grumpy crunch" sounds) in order to inflict maximum auditory annoyance on said stingy host, whom the eater strongly feels should have been more willing/capable of providing him with a more pleasant repast (i.e., crispy-fresh potato chips instead of somewhat-stale veggie-wafers or salt-free corn-chips which not only taste disgusting but are also now as hard as a rock because nobody else wanted to eat 'em either, and so they have been just sitting around for two weeks! Extra points if the unhappy chewer thinks to actually **add* a portion of even more "noisy" food --- like dry-roasted peanuts --- to the disgusting mix prior to falling to, since it will make said grunching all the more grindingly-deafening and thus hopefully more "persuasive" to the host, and compel him to make a trip to the supermarket or corner-grocery in search of more pleasant edibles.
Thrifty-minded parent: I always keep a little cello-pouch of disposable earplugs in my shirt-pocket, so that I can pop 'em in whenever I serve my teenage son a snack of leftovers... not only does it save my having to listen to his whiny complaining, but it also prevents my eardrums from "direct assault" while he's grunching his way through the bowlful. The food I give him is plenty good enough, and he needs to learn about economizing and being non-wasteful... I've told him a thousand times that (A) I'm not made of money and (B) there are children starving in Africa, and so I am NOT going to let perfectly good food just get thrown away, or make a special trip to Kroger's just to satisfy his discriminating palate!
hippie-yi-yo-kai-yay
The whoop-of-joy expression of the long-haired 420-friendly counter-culture group from the sixties and seventies. Viva, Woodstock!!!
We know all the songs that the crowd-boys know
'Bout the big corral where the peace-nuts go
We learned 'em all on the radio
Hippie-yi-yo-kai-yay... hippie-yi-yo-kai-yay.
'Bout the big corral where the peace-nuts go
We learned 'em all on the radio
Hippie-yi-yo-kai-yay... hippie-yi-yo-kai-yay.
hippie-yi-yo-kai-yay by QuacksO July 20, 2018
Decembrrrr
Decembrrrr comes after the three progressively-chillier months or Septembr, Octobrr, and Novembrrr. No wonder they say that northern farmers shouldn't try to grow crops during any month with an "R" in its name!
Decembrrrr by QuacksO July 20, 2018