Len Bakerloo's definitions

Invertible

In linear algebra, an n-by-n square matrix A is called invertible (also nonsingular or nondegenerate) if there exists an n-by-n square matrix B such that:

AB = BA = I (where I is the Identity Matrix).

Otherwise, in life, it refers to the case where something can be transformed into something else and transformed back.

Randy: Sally is so invertible; real marriage material.

Sandy: I know, nonsingularly so. Put a few drinks in her and you can get her on her back and yet in the morning she still gets up and cooks you breakfast.

by Len Bakerloo July 6, 2016

transnamed

Being given a name at birth (or adopting one later) that is not normally associated with the societally recognized gender you were born with (or choose later).

Johnny Cash wrote a song about a transnamed cisgendered Boy Named Sue.

by Len Bakerloo December 16, 2018

proximate

prox· i· mate | \ˈpräk-sə-mət \ 1) A person you mate with who is close to you by kinship or in some other way. 2) A person who mates with you on behalf of another, i.e. a proxy mate.

Jack: Hey, are you and your second cousin still fuck buddies?
John: No. She moved to California, but she sent me Jill as her proximate, and she's awesome.
---
Mike Pence is Donald Trump's kochsucker proximate for the one percenters.

by Len Bakerloo December 22, 2018

perchild

An extremely politically correct variant of "person" introduced as an alternative to the use of "perdaughter" to appease women and because "person and/or perdaughter and/or other" is both cumbersome and offensive to the non-binary.

Person A: Honey, the postman just delivered the mail.

Perchild B: Two years ago we were told that the proper term is "postperson" because it was determined that the "postman" is offensive to women. Last year regulators realized that "person" is offencive to daughters so now must use "postperchild" otherwise we won't get any mail.

Person A: May I refer to him as Fred.

Perchild B: No. That is offensive to all people not named Fred.

Person A: But his name is Fred.

Perchild B: That's irrelevant. And, if you ever call me "honey" again I'm going to divorce you.

by Len Bakerloo January 8, 2019

Homeland Security

A federal agency established after 9/11/2001 to carry on the work of the terrorists. They help us fear nature by taking over FEMA and diverting funds that would have been spent on hurricane relief to equip meter maids with assault rifles. Constant reminders to "report suspicious behavior" to the police have made us fear each other and criminalized social anxiety disorder. Thanks to their fine efforts, being too shy to ask a girl for sex is now as likely to get you investigated as asking a girl for sex.

If you want to know why you feel insecure blame Homeland Security.

by Len Bakerloo June 16, 2018

Orgy Dome

The sole reason Burning Man exists.

Skybird: Didn't we meet last year at the Orgy Dome at Burning Man? Sunflower: I've never been to the Orgy Dome. Skybird: Neither have I. It must have been two other people.

by Len Bakerloo June 16, 2018

Binary

A gender preference that can be encoded using a single bit in a computer, where, by convention, 0=Male and 1=Female. This standard was established in a truce between the religious conservative camp who believe that men come first and the radical feminist camp who believe men count for nothing

I'm hexadecimal. I don't identify as binary.

by Len Bakerloo June 17, 2018